My Jesus Journey: as wife, mom, & everday woman.

How my abortion has effected my children

2012-01-16T15:28:00.001-06:00

I've avoided writing this blog for almost 2 months because it's incredibly hard to admit. Over Thanksgiving my sister & two nephews from TX came to visit us one afternoon. My nephews are 13 & 6 & my boys (6, 3, & 1) adore their cousins! They were able to play together while my sister & I drank coffee & visited. A couple of days after they left, my 6 year old, Brady, asked me how old my nephew Caleb was. I told him 13 & this was his response,

"Wow! 13! That's so cool! I wish I had a big brother that was 13!"

I had no idea how to respond. All I could think about was he DID have an older brother, who would in fact be 13 in a month IF I had not had an abortion. I went to my bathroom & cried. I had never thought how my abortion would effect my future children. I realized that my sister & I would have two sons the same ages. It was a hard hit that I never expected. Thinking about it again makes me cry all over!

Thirteen years ago I made a very bad decision based out of fear & shame from my rape. I did not want to have an abortion, I knew it was wrong, but I was so scared. I made a choice that has never left me. So many people will use girls like me to excuse the abortion because of rape.

Well let me tell you once again, rape is NO EXCUSE for abortion. My abortion has effected me far worse than the rape. I live everyday knowing a piece of me is missing. I praise God for healing me of the shame, guilt, fear, & worthlessness I felt for so many years, but I will always REGRET my abortion, I will always GRIEVE my child.

Every Christmas when shopping for my 3 lil boys I always wonder what Joshua (my son that I aborted) would've liked. When I meet young boys who are the age he would've been I wonder how much like them he would be. What kind of big brother he would be? What would he grow up to become? I will never have an answer for these things, I will always wonder.

I miss him more than words could ever express! I know my boys are missing out by not having him here. I long for the day I can hold him & hug him in Heaven!

I can never undo the choice I made that day as a frightened, young, naive 18 year old girl, but I can live my life honoring Joshua & his memory by sharing my story, fighting to end abortion, striving to have personhood laws passed, helping other post-abortive women find healing in Christ. I have no idea how I will tell my children about their brother Joshua & why he is Heaven, why he was never born. I pray that God alone will guide us through that as a family girded in His truths & His unconditional love!

I pray blessings over you all & no matter what you have done in your life, it is NOT too big for the Cross! I'm grateful everyday that Jesus took my place & died for my sins! Oh how I deserve that pain & death He bore that day! Yet He looked on me with such love that He died in my place! What an amazing, loving, Savior we serve!

Miracles, March for Life, & the Mickey Mouse Club

2012-01-10T14:04:00.000-06:00

All Christians believe God does miracles. Sometimes we say things randomly happen, but we know that God works everything out & those random things are orchestrated by Him to bring about a purpose for His divine will. Well do you believe that God used one of my favorite childhood shows, the Mickey Mouse Club, to begin another journey for me?

Well believe it!

During the Yes on 26 Personhood Campaign a lady named Danielle began following me on Twitter. Sunday night she tweeted that a former Mouseketeer was going to be on the singing competition The Voice. (Are you laughing yet?) I immediately replied because I was so in love with this guy in 5th grade :)!! Then a follower of hers replies to us laughing because she was an extra on the MMC. I was immediately intrigued by this so I went to her profile to see who she was.

Kelly Clinger was not only apart of the MMC, but she was also a back up singer for Britney Spears in the past. Her profile stated that she was post abortive & involved with the Silent No More campaign that helps men & women who've had abortions & others who have been affected by abortion. I told her briefly about my prolife stuff & directed her to the video of me at a press conference speaking out on why rape is not an excuse for abortion.

She asked if in fact that was me & was ecstatic that it was!!! She said she had shared the video many times & had hoped, along with others apart of Silent No More, that we would come in contact. How amazing is that!?! God used the MMC to bring us together! I love how He works sometimes! In ways we LEAST expect it!

She invited me to be apart of the March for Life that takes place each year around the anniversary of Roe vs Wade. Thousands of people come each year to take a stand for life & a stand against abortion. Many women & men who've had abortions, paid for abortions, helped someone get an abortion, or are somehow affected by abortion give their testimonies in front of the Supreme Court in Washington DC. I found out about this in 2008 & added it my "bucket list" of things I wanted to do.

Many states hold their own March for Life events & I had decided to do the March for Life in my state. God clearly had other plans. He knew my deep desire to go to Washington DC & fulfill this dream. He birthed in me long ago to take a major stand against abortion, to stand up for life, to bring glory to His truth & His Word, by using my testimony. For months now He has been opening doors for me to share my story & how He has set me free & healed me. I'm currently in the process of writing my own post-abortion Bible study! (prayers!!)

I talked to Kelly yesterday & she told me if I could get to DC to speak, my hotel would FREE, they really wanted me to be apart of this. I told my husband & we both knew that we didn't have the money to pay for a last-minute plane ticket to get me there. I immediately began praying, asking God to make a way, to do a miracle if He wanted me there. I asked all my prayer warriors to join in & pray with me. I had decided though, that if it didn't work out I would be ok, I would just do my local one & save up for next year.

A lady who used to attend my church asked me how someone could send me money to help me go. I gave her my information, not expecting a lot, because let's face it, I was going to need hundreds of dollars & in today's economy I didn't expect anyone to just GIVE me the money. This morning she calls me bright & early & tells me about a lady from her current church that has had an abortion. This lady has never really talked about her abortion because of her young children, but is active in helping prolife efforts. She also saw the video of me back in November & immediately wanted to help me.

Two other families had been praying, asking God to show them where to give some extra money to & when they heard about my need, they immediately believed it was from God & donated their money to help me go to DC!! I have never even met these people! All they know about me is what they saw in a short video pleading for people to not use rape as an excuse for abortion & to see that God is the Creator of life. That one day has COMPLETELY & utterly changed my life forever!!! I am so incredibly humbled by my Savior!!

Faith + Prayer = POWER!!! After I hung up the phone I burst into tears thanking my Lord over & over! I'm tearing up again writing this! He is such a loving Daddy to His children! My flight is booked, I'm working on childcare, & golly gee whiz I'm HEADED TO DC!!!!! I know this trip is going to open so many more doors! I can't even imagine what the Lord is up to, but I trust Him & my answer is "YES LORD!!! SEND ME!! I WILL GO FOR YOU!!!" (Isaiah 6:8)

This humbles me more than I can say. Just this past Sunday at church a lady told me about a state senator who was making statements that he would NEVER allow personhood to pass in our state. Of course this just broke me because I know firsthand how important such a law is! On the way to church that evening Satan had began torturing me. I had a VERY vivid flashback of my rape. I had not had one in many years. He kept taunting me, telling me I was wrong, I wasn't raped, & so forth. That night I couldn't keep it together. I just kept crying my eyes out because I knew the truth, but because I was unconscious for a greater part of it, there is a lot I don't remember. Through my tears I kept praising God & holding on to the truths I have in Him. My husband & I had our pastor pray over us & immediately felt much better. When we got home is when all of the aforementioned stuff came to be. I love how God shows off His love for me! He didn't have to a thing more than He's already done for me & yet He keeps pushing me forward, walking beside me, leading me down new paths for His purpose.

Please continue to pray for me & my family & for all those traveling to DC for this event. We know that anytime we move forward for Christ, Satan will be right behind us ready to attack us & break us down. Thank you for being a part of this journey with me! The support & prayer from friends & strangers has kept me going during these last months & continues to help me forge ahead!

Blessings to you all & I can't wait to come back & tell you ALL about it!!

2011 Year In Review

2011-12-29T12:55:00.053-06:00

What a year! I started 2011 in a very odd place. 2010 ended with relationships I had realized had ended too and would probably never be same if ever recovered so I entered 2011 whole-heartily seeking the Lord to fill that lonely space. I was extremely hungry for His Word & a new direction in my spiritual journey. The last few days of 2010 I asked the Lord to give me a Word for the new year & this is what He gave me:

"Forget about what's happened; don't keep going over old history. Be alert, be present. I'm about to do something brand-new. It's bursting out! Don't you see it? There it is! I'm making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands." Isaiah 43:19b-20a

At the time I wasn't sure exactly what that meant, but for what I was going through with various relationships, I knew I had to let go of them, cling to the Lord & move forward so He could begin a new work in me...& so I did.

A couple years earlier the Lord gave me a dream that disturbed me & I didn't know what it meant at the time, but by mid-January it was revealed. I began the journey of learning about spiritual warfare & how those you trust spiritually & seem to know God's Word cannot always be trusted. Pride, manipulation, greed, & control aren't always easy to detect especially when you love & trust those who are leaders & your friends. In 2011 the most valuable thing I learned was that I have got to KNOW what God's Word says, what it doesn't, to not just trust other Christian leaders, but to ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS seek the Bible, seek the Holy Spirit & to trust His Word will NEVER contradict what the Holy Spirit is saying & vice versa. If the two don't line up, it's NOT the Holy Spirit, but a counterfeit.

I began a study of Redemptive Gifts (not spiritual gifts) & it was amazing to understand how God designed me, why I react to things a certain way, why I'm passionate about certain things over others, etc. Romans 12:5-9 lists them, & I HIGHLY recommend the study by Charles R. Wade called Designed For Fulfillment. The leader of my group really made us dig down deep into understand the power of the tongue & how we bless & curse others without recognizing it & how others have cursed us by things they've said to us. This is why Scripture tells to speak in love for the building up of others, because the power of the tongue can be deadly. This study helped me feel bolder about who I am in Christ.

I also began training to be a leader in a chronological Bible study for women my church is doing in 2012. It is going to be AMAZING!!! It was put together by Donna Gaines & Iva May. I also HIGHLY recommend it! If you live near me, my church is offering it at two different times, Sundays 4-5:30 or Wednesdays 6-7:30, childcare available & even if you aren't a member of my church, still sign up!!! These wonderful Godly women have put this study together so the story of the Bible is easier to understand, they've made it fit together like a puzzle so you see how everything relates & it all comes back to Christ. I cannot wait!

On the family front we've had our ups & downs in 2011. In March we had to move out of house for 6 weeks for extreme foundation repair. This was NOT fun for me! Thankfully we had some friends from church who let us stay in a "mother-in-law" suite on the end of their house. Being a stay-at-home/homeschooling mom of 3 young boys trapped in a small room day in & day out about drove me nutty! Shortly after we moved back in our house my husband & his business partner started a new business which meant his pay was significantly decreased until the company gets settled. The stress of money could have shaken us, but I am blessed to have a husband who trusts the Lord & prays. We know he is on the right path for his job & we know it will all come together in God's timing. We need for nothing that God hasn't provided.

I was actually able to accomplish some of my physical goals this year! I had hoped to lose 50 lbs, but ended up only losing 20. I'm not complaining because I know you only get what you put in, so I'm going to be thankful & proud of that 20 & keep pushing til I reach my goal! I also trained & ran my 1st 5K in March! I was very proud of myself & have started to train again & hope to reach a 1/2 marathon in 2012!

Some fun stuff that happen this was getting to meet 3 of my favorite Christian recording artists! The beginning of the year, I ran into Kari Jobe at a cafe when she was in town for a concert! Talk about a HIGHLIGHT!!! I adore her! I was able to see her 2x this year in concert! I also got meet Brandon Heath & Natalie Grant at a concert this spring. Favor abounded!

In August I was able to take a girls' trip to Chicago with 4 friends. It was wonderful! Chicago is a beautiful city! It was nice to get away & site see in a new city & take in the shopping, food, & all the tourism could offer! I'm pretty sure we hit all the major sites! It was a good break from reality.

This fall brought on a new election in my state & on the ballot was Amendment 26 which would've declared a person from the moment of fertilization & it would have led to shutting down cloning in our state, an end to abortion, & better treatment of frozen embryos from IVF treatments. Of course Planned Parenthood & other pro-choice groups leaped on our state filling even the smartest & wisest people with lies about what 26 could possibly, maybe, might, do & out of fear & no reverence of God's Word, the majority of Mississippians voted no. This amendment did a whopper on me! God told me long long ago He was going to use my past to bring Him glory, to share with others of His healing grace, & the truth of His Word. My time had come! After writing on this very blog I was contacted by a pro-life group to share my story on our local news, & from there the Lord kept calling me places to speak. You can read more about all of it here.

Even though it didn't pass God awakened many Christians in our state to rise up. You CANNOT be pro-life BUT...! You are either pro-life or you're not. Now more than ever I see why we have got to know God's Word, to trust Him, & to fight for Christian values & morals!!! It breaks my heart that Mississippi, known to be the heart of the Bible Belt, couldn't vote for something that is simply lined up with God's Word. In my opinion MS has lost the right to call itself the Bible Belt. Many in the pro-life movement are still working toward personhood & an end to abortion & I am PROUD to now officially be apart of this! I'm in awe of what the Lord has done in me through this! Humbled doesn't even begin to describe it!

This year again has led me to an end of some friendships & the beginning of others. Some of those others are merely through Twitter & homeschool blogs with other homeschool moms. It's nice to have that support from other moms walking that path! Another lesson I've learned is that we all get too easily offended over things that don't need to be offended about. I'd go into detail, but that's another blog I'm working on! :)

2011 is definitely ending better than 2010 did & how the year began! I'm incredibly excited to see what Christ has in store for me this year! I know I'm utterly blessed & thankful for everything, the good & the bad. I pray this year I continue to hunger for His Word, dive into the Bible & learn it deeper, apply it daily, & continuously seek after God! Jeremiah 29:11 doesn't mean a lot if we don't 1st follow Jeremiah 29:13!

I pray blessings over you all in the year of 2012! May we all seek after God & love others as He has loved us!

NEAT-O

2011-12-25T21:19:00.000-06:00

I LOVE the beginning of a new year! With one week left in 2011 I am preparing & researching tips to help me stay more organized this year. As a stay at home mom & homeschooling my house tends to get crazy cluttered VERY easily! My boys, 6, 3, & 1 are home during the day playing, schooling, crafting, just being boys! This makes it hard to stay on top of cleaning because they are always around to mess things up, not that I'm complaining :) Add on top of that the homeschooling papers & books & such & organization flies out of the window!

I am not even close to be a Type-A neat freak so I need all the help I can get! Here are some links I plan to utilize to help me in this endeavor. If you've found some other sites or have your own tips PLEASE share!!

Blessings to you all!

Ash

Here is a 52 week challenge I'm going to try out for organization. Each week I will post each challenge.

10 things to do each day to stay organized.

2012 Declutter Monthly Calendars (LOVE this!)

10-15 mins of cleaning each day (this WHOLE site is awesome)

Why We Don't "Do Santa"

2011-12-05T13:00:00.000-06:00

First I want to say I do not consider myself more holy or righteous because we don't do Santa, nor do I think any parents that do Santa & elves less holy or unrighteous. I firmly believe everyone has their own convictions & when God leads you down a certain path then you must take it & this is why we don't do Santa. Secondly, I am not writing this to convince anyone to see things my way, but rather to share what Christ has led us to & if you have any questions, please ask me, & most importantly seek God & search the Scriptures for yourself. No one has to answer to me, we all however have to give an account to Him. So obey Him as He leads you.

In college I babysat for a family who didn't do Santa. I never heard of such a thing before! They explained to me that their decision rested in God. The husband came from a family full of liars & exaggerators & even himself would tell little lies for no reason. Lying was a generational sin in his family that was very strong & Scripture tells us that Satan is the father of all lies (no matter how big or small). Because lying was such a strong issue they knew they couldn't afford to lie to their children about anything, especially things that could cause confusion later on or that Satan could use their personal generational sin as leverage against them. Plus, because of their faith in Jesus, they wanted to focus on Him in all that they did year round. They also didn't do the Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy, but explained to their kids that other children did believe in this stuff & that if a child asked them if they believed, they should be honest & say no, but they didn't need to try & convince them, or make them feel bad because they believed.

I was a new believer & I had never heard of this concept before, but I thought it was pretty amazing, being honest about everything...who would've thought?! You see I grew up in lies. I knew my parents & siblings lied about lots of things. My friends from school would lie about things, & I would lie when I felt I needed or just wanted to. I knew lying was wrong, but apparently it wasn't that big of deal. I never really believed in Santa. I remember being 4 years old & arguing with my mom that Santa did not bring me my Strawberry Shortcake bike because the Sears logo was on it. (I was quite smart-ha)! In my head if Santa brought it it would've come from the North Pole not Sears, I had seen all the Christmas movies where elves made the toys. Then in 1st grade I found all my presents in a closet & when I asked my mom she said Santa brought them early because we weren't going to be home on Christmas. I didn't buy that either. I wanted to believe in Santa, but I just knew he wasn't real. It also made me mad that everyone kept lying to me & refused to just tell me the truth. So sometimes I would go along with it, even though I knew the truth.

I didn't feel any less "magic" at Christmas because let's face it, presents are good no matter where they come from! I think this time of year is full of "magic" for many people in spite of what you believe or don't believe because the "holiday" season has been engraved in our heads as a special time to give & get, to celebrate life & love, family & friends etc etc. No real need for Jesus at all right?

When I became a momma my thoughts & views on many things changed & have continued to change. The more I grow in my walk with Christ the more my thoughts & views change, because now Christ is opening my eyes & my heart to His ways. I battled Brady's 1st 3 Christmases over the Santa issue. He was too young to understand anyway, so I didn't really talk about it much. I debated about having Santa bring him 3 gifts because the Wisemen brought Jesus 3 gifts, but it still bugged me that I was lying to my child. Most people don't seem to think that lying about Santa is a big deal, that letting them believe in a myth is ok because "they're only kids once." Well, it bothers me. I know the majority of people who grew up believing in Santa aren't scarred because they realized it wasn't true, but my spirit was strongly opposed to it anyway.

When I 1st became a teacher there was a young child in another class that didn't believe in Santa & her teacher complained about how annoying it was that she didn't believe & all the other kids did. This teacher thought this young girl sucked the fun out of all her Santa activities because she knew the truth. I never understood it because I had never met this young girl. Two summers ago I got the privilege to hear this now teenage girl speak about her faith in Christ & how her Godly parents had raised her to know Jesus from early on & the truths of Scripture. Listening to her talk about her parents & how they raised her helped her to love others & speak the truth of Christ to everyone, especially the lost. My spirit was relieved, because I imagined her as child not annoyed by Santa, but probably heartbroken that her peers were more excited by a myth than the Reason for Christmas.

Two days later I was in Target with my boys & a worker came up to me & asked if I wanted her to tell them an older man down the aisle was Santa & he was spying on them. I looked at the man, big belly, snowy white beard, & laughed. I told her no, we didn't do Santa. She didn't scoff at me, she just politely said ok & complimented on how well behaved my boys were being. It was such a weird moment, but I knew God had orchestrated it for me. The very next day driving around, Brady, who was 5 asked me if Santa was real or make-believe. He didn't hear the woman ask about Santa, it was July so nothing about Santa was even around, so I'm not even sure what made him ask. I knew that this too was a moment God had put into motion for me & I answered truthfully, "He's make believe honey, but there was a real man named St. Nicholas..." & I proceeded to tell him what I knew about the real one.

When Christmas came around I prayed once again that God would give me the right words to share with my boys. I bought the Veggie Tale movie about St. Nicholas & we read a story about him & how Santa Claus came to be. Then we read about the birth of Jesus & I shared with him the true meaning of Christmas. We still get our picture taken with Santa each year, we enjoy looking at lights, & watching the many Christmas shows that come on, but Brady understands that Santa is a character like Buzz Lightyear & Lighting McQueen. That Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus. We do lots of fun activities & crafts, we even do a Jesse Tree that teaches the genealogy of Christ.

I don't feel any pressure to make up stories or lies to make Christmas magical because it is magical in a supernatural way! I do enjoy seeing the crazy fun things people come up with for their Elves on Shelves & I don't think any less of any parent who does the worldly view of Christmas & the Christian view of Christmas. That is between them & Christ alone. I however have to do what Christ has led us to do.

Here are some Scriptures that remind me of why I won't lie to my kids about Santa & why I have to keep the focus solely on Jesus:

2 Peter 1:16 For we have not followed cunningly devised fables, when we made known unto you the power and coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, but were eyewitnesses of his majesty.
1 Timothy 1:4 Don't pay attention to myths and endless genealogies, which give rise to mere speculation rather than furthering the administration of God which is by faith.
Mark 7:13 setting aside the word of God for your tradition that you delivered; and many such like things you do.’
2 Timothy 4:3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires; :4 and will turn away their ears from the truth, and will turn aside to myths.
Joshua 24:15 But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.As a Christian momma the best thing I can do for my children is to walk a Godly path the best I can, to continue to grow in Christ, to teach them truth & Scripture & how to apply it in their lives & not to give in on the convictions God has laid on me because someone else does it differently. So my only challenge for each of you reading is to seek Him. Ask the Lord if there are traditions & things you need to change for His sake. And then do as He calls you to. Not just about Santa, but in all things. It's not always easy, & I fail more than I like, but with Jesus by my side I know ALL things are possible!

Many Christmas blessings to you all!

Blessings Unlimited Virtual Gathering

2011-11-28T09:20:00.000-06:00

Welcome to your Blessings Unlimited “Virtual” Gathering!

Here you will Shop, Connect, Win Prizes and be Blessed - all on-line!

Let me take just a moment to give you just a little history about this amazing company called Blessings Unlimited. We were founded in 2006 by DaySpring Cards, the world’s leading producer of Christian Greeting Cards & Gifts. DaySpring became a subsidiary of Hallmark Cards in 1999. Since 1971 DaySpring has partnered with Christian stores in local communities to offer meaningful products. Blessings Unlimited continues this tradition and extends it to the home. Based in Siloam Springs, Arkansas, the name Blessings Unlimited is based on this Scripture from John: From the fullness of His grace we have all received one blessing after another. John 1:16NIV

When a company’s Mission Statement is: “To pursue the heart of God and bring blessings to others.” How can you NOT want to team up with them?

So, what is a Gathering?

I’m so glad you asked! Traditionally, a Blessings Unlimited Independent Consultant brings an assortment of our fabulous products to your home for a totally unique get together for you and your friends, family and neighbors. It is a wonderful blend of fellowship and shopping of products that will surround you in your home and remind you of His Word!

As a Hostess of a Gathering, you are automatically entered into our Hostess Rewards Program! You can earn your favorite products for half price or free (based on the sales of your Gathering). Even earn a FREE Bonus Gift - when your Gathering reaches a goal!

Guest Sales*	FREE Products*	Half Price Products
$100-$249		1
$250-$399	10% of sales	1
$400-$799	15% of sales	2
$800+	15% of sales	3

Hostess Rewards Bonus {Free Gift}

Your Choice of One!

Why a “Virtual” Gathering (My Specialty)?

Well, if you are like me, you are so busy these days you rarely have any free time for yourself. In fact, do you even remember what that is? By Hosting a Virtual Gathering, either on your blog, Facebook or through e-mail, you can still gather all your Besties together to shop products that will uplift your homes and all who enter it! Plus, win some awesome prizes!

Let the Shopping BEGIN!

Pour yourself a warm cup of coffee or tea. Mmmmm maybe even treat yourself to a cinnamon roll as well! Sit back, relax and have fun shopping our Blessings Unlimited website. Browse through our beautiful on line catalog and place your orders on the “Shop” tab - it’s that simple! Oh, but first, don’t forget to check out the November Hostess & Guest Promotions (click here) for all of this months fabulous offers!

Now of course, you can’t have a Blessings Unlimited Gathering with out someone winning a prize (or two or three)! So, are you ready to find out what YOU could win? Here you go!

~ All you need to do to be entered to win one of thee awesome prizes is post a comment right here on this blog telling us what item(s) are your ABSOLUTE MUST HAVES - from our catalog! Be sure to leave your e-mail address for us as well! ~

Blog Prize ($25 Retail Value):

A Blessings Unlimited Eco Tote, 2- “Ten Blessings for Your Home” 5x7 Pictures, Pen and Sticky Note Pad, 8 Assorted Birthday Cards, and 10 Thank You Cards!

~ One guest from this Virtual Gathering will WIN this PRIZE! ~

By Grace Alone ($26 Retail Value):

Bonus prize #1 goes up for grabs when this Virtual Gathering reaches $300 Retail Guest Purchases - YOU could win this Wall Décor!

Joy Necklace ($48 Retail Value):

Bonus prize #2 goes up for grabs when this Virtual Gathering reaches $500 Retail Guest Purchases - YOU could win this beautiful necklace!

That is up to 3 prizes ($99 Total Retail Value) that could be given away!

So Invite your friends, tweet away and post about this Gathering on Facebook! The more who join in and shop the more prizes I giveaway!

This Virtual Gathering will be open November 28 thru December 2 at 8:00pm!

All winners will be chosen at random by www.random.org

To find out more about becoming a Consultant or Hosting your own Virtual Gathering contact me at: BlessingsUnlimitedWithMeg@gmail.com

Thank you so much for joining our Virtual Gathering! I hope you have fun shopping and making your wish lists! Please don’t hesitate to contact me with any questions you may have.

Be inspired. Be connected. Be blessed.

Blessings Unlimited - Independent Consultant

You can find me at: Facebook ~ Twitter ~ BlessingsUnlimitedWithMeg@gmail.com ~ www.myblessingsunlimited.net/Meg

Be Inspired. Be Connected. Be Blessed.

How this all came to be

2011-11-02T10:22:00.001-05:00

The last few days have been a whirlwind to me! I feel like I should lay flat on the ground & worship Jesus & never get up! I need a new word for humbled because I don't think humbled even touches what I am! Last Thursday I finally gave in to Jesus & wrote in my blog about my rape & abortion. The feed back was immediately great. That night I saw a commercial against Amendment 26 with a woman saying she had been raped & that abortion is ok for rape victims.

Immediately my heart sank. I felt like Satan was mocking me, laughing in my face. I immediately called the Yes for 26 campaign & told them my story over the voicemail. Early Friday morning they called me back & said they wished they somehow could do a commercial with me, but time was just so short, but if something came up they would call me.

I went on with my morning, got the kids some McDonald's & went to get my hair done. As soon as I walked in Yes on 26 called & said they wanted me to do an interview with a local news station to share my story! Now you know God has EXCELLENT timing because my roots were HORRID! He waited just in time for me to get all prettied up :)

My family still didn't know about what I had been through. So before the news aired on TV my husband called his family & I got in touch with mine to let them know. The cat was finally out of the bag! They were all supportive of me, but my dad seems to be taking it hard that I didn't tell him back then. So please pray for him. I don't want him or anyone else to hurt.

That afternoon I went to the MS Baptist Convention to film my interview. It went great! The MBC were so excited I was sharing my story they wanted the footage to show at their convention. Unfortunately when the interview aired it wasn't at all what we were expecting.

Social Media Used In Battle Over Personhood

I was really bummed that after all I said, that is what aired. But I kept trusting God & knew His will would proceed. Over the weekend many people were calling, texting, facebooking me to let me know they saw the clip & were praying for me & thanking me for being so brave. My former BSU (Baptist Student Union) director asked me to speak to his students at a local community college next week. I was just amazed at the response I was hearing & could only thank Jesus for using me & keeping His promise, not that I ever doubted He would.

Unfortunately the news channel wouldn't give out the raw footage to the MBC for them to show at their convention so my wonderful church agreed to refilm me. The Lord made a way. My in-law's church will be airing that footage this Sunday too! God is doing a MIGHTY work! I am merely His vessel! Monday morning I got an email from the Yes on 26 Campaign asking me to come to their press conference & possibly speak. The whole day I just prayed & prayed that Jesus would speak through me! And boy howdy did He!!

After the speakers of the press conference were finished the reporters & crowd were able to to ask questions. A retired OBGYN was giving her medical side on a question then a group of people from Parents Against MS 26 yelled out, "What about in the case of incest & rape? Shouldn't women who are raped be able to have an abortion?" And this video is what followed.

I knew I was talking, but Jesus was speaking through me! It is now all over Facebook & YouTube. Can't go back now. :) But God told me years ago, many times He reminded me that He was going to use my story to bring Him glory. After all, it's really His story because when I gave my life to Jesus, I gave Him my past, present, & future.

I just hope & pray & ask that you pray that the LIES & MISINFORMATION about 26 & the HYPOTHETICAL situations don't scare people from the truth about what 26 says & what it WILL do, not what it MIGHT do.

Blessings to you all!!

Truth about LIFE

2011-10-27T12:43:00.000-05:00

In Mississippi there is a lot of buzz about a new amendment being proposed to voters. Amendment 26 if passed will end abortion & cloning our state. Mississippi would then be the 1st & only state to stand up against abortion, though it wouldn't completely be able to overturn Roe vs Wade. Right now there is only one abortion clinic & it has been under fire for years due to the abortion doctor's bad choices. I know a lawyer who has a case a against him & the clinic & I pray it gets shut down soon.

Along with Amendment 26 comes a lot of misguided lies about what this amendment will or will not do. Those against it say it will ban birth control, stop invitrofertilization, choose for a mother to die over a baby, & could even have mothers arrested for murder if they miscarry. How absurd!!! This amendment will end abortion in the clinic, stop other clinics from opening, end cloning research on human embryos, & discontinue abortifacients type drugs, which are not THE PILL :)

If the amendment gets passed then it will have to go to our state's legislation who then lay the groundwork for the new law. Amendment 26 is meant for good not harm which cannot be stated for abortion.

As Christians we have got to start sticking up for what the Bible teaches & not what we fear because Scripture teaches us to not fear & to stick up for those who can't speak for themselves & I'm certain an unborn child falls into that category.

If you are a Mississippian I ask that you spend a great amount of time in prayer before you vote. Do not let the lies & scare tactics sway you from God's truth. If you are not a Mississippian I pray that you will pray for our state on this issue & your own state.

Many people agree that a woman who gets pregnant from rape or incest should be allowed to have an abortion. I disagree. A month before my 18th birthday I was drugged & raped by a high school guy I would have considered to be a good friend. I ended up getting pregnant from that rape. This is the first time I have ever blogged about this, but I need to share. A week before my rape a friend & I were being silly & video recording ourselves doing skits & such. On that tape I said that I believed abortion was wrong (and I meant it!) & that even IF I ever got raped I wouldn't have an abortion. (Famous last words!)

I won't go into all the details, but my home life was horrible. I was already depressed (though I didn't know that) & I was scared out of my mind to tell anyone the truth. I told the guy that if he paid for the abortion I would have one. I basically wanted to run away from my problems, but I have learned the hard way, you CANNOT run from your troubles no matter what! You have to face them!

I went into the clinic & told the "counselor" I was raped but really didn't want to have an abortion, but I didn't know what else to do. Her response, "Ok, sign this paper saying you understand what will happen during the procedure." That was it. My counseling. No warnings about about the emotions & such I would face afterward, the pain, my breast swelling & filling with milk, etc. Ok honestly, it was all in this packet I got, but no one verbally told me anything. Here I was a scared 18 year old girl who just went through a traumatic event & was having to make the hardest decision of my life, completely alone. I NEEDED someone to talk to.

I thought that having the abortion meant it would just all go away, I moved from TX to MS to get away from it all, but it never left me. Horrible nightmares plagued me for years about my rape & my abortion. Suicide attempts were made, constant drinking to numb my pain; I was a wreck. Years later when I finally got some real counseling I was diagnosed with PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder). At 19 I got saved & things were looking up. I knew Jesus forgave me & was able to forgive my rapist, my mom, friends I told, but didn't stop me (I blamed a lot of people). But I could not in ANY way forgive myself!!!

What I did to my child was FAR worse than what my rapist did to me! No child should be punished because of the sins of the parents. My child was innocent.

When I transferred to my university I found myself alone again. All my Christian friends went to different schools, my boyfriend (who is now my husband) was working 4 hours away, & Satan saw a perfect opportunity to ravage me. And because I was so eat up with guilt & fear & shame & worthlessness, I let him. Nightmares came back worse than ever & the drinking got worse than ever. I remember begging God to tell me my baby's name because the Bible says He calls us by name & I wanted to know my child's name! He told my his name was Joshua. That gave me some peace, but now when the nightmares came I could see my little boy's face so clearly it made it harder to sleep.

I finally threw myself on the altar at church one Sunday morning & begged God to break me of this cycle. He told me that He loved me & I could feel His arms wrapped tightly around me. I never took another drink & the nightmares stopped. About a year later I was married & pregnant with baby number 2, my sweet Brady. Unfortunately I still couldn't forgive myself & continued to listen to the lies of Satan.

"You can't tell anyone! These Christians wont understand! They already know you're not good enough! It's too shameful! Your friends will leave you! You'll have to leave your church! You'll bring shame to your husband! What mother could forgive herself?!" etc etc etc. I believed every single LIE!

When I was pregnant with my 2nd born (Rylan) I was at church one Sunday & God reminded me that 10 years ago that day I was pregnant with my first son Joshua. He wanted me to see how far He had brought me. :) He told me that Joshua was another name for Yeshua, which means JESUS! Joshua means "The Lord is my salvation." It was because of my rape & abortion that took me to the lowest pits of hell. But I had a love for that sweet baby that made me run toward Jesus. My son Joshua helped lead me to Christ. We gave Rylan the middle name Joshua in honor of his brother. :)

A couple years ago I did a post-abortive Bible study at a local CPC (Center for Pregnancy Choices) & it was terribly hard! I had to relive every moment of my rape & abortion, but it was necessary for my recovery. During the 6th week God gave me Isaiah 43:1b-3a

"“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine! When you pass through rough waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through raging rivers, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not consume you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior!"

The moment I read that verse I was HEALED!!!! No more shame, guilt, fear, worry, or worthless feelings! I felt like a new woman! I WAS a new woman!!! Jesus set me free & Satan couldn't lie to me about it anymore! Praise GOD! Jesus also gave me "beauty for ashes" with blessing me with my 3 sweet boys, Brady, Rylan, & Keller!!

At the end of the Bible study we had memorials for our babies that had been aborted. You see they were REAL HUMANS!!! Not tissue!! Not a mass! REAL BABIES THAT WERE ALIVE!!! We honored them & called them by name. This December Joshua would have been 13 years old. I am ever so grateful for my Redeemer! I know without any doubt that someday when my life on earth is over I will be reunited with him in Heaven! We serve a LOVING GOD! A loving God who can cleanse every spot, wash away every sin no matter "how bad" that sin is! A loving God who I believe with every part of my being would want us (ALL CHRISTIANS) to vote YES on 26! Because LIFE matters. He is the Creator of LIFE!

Think about it! I got pregnant by rape-unplanned, God created Joshua, not me, not my rapist. My other 3 boys were planned, but I did not create them, GOD DID! Men & women who struggle with infertility cannot create life! ONLY GOD CAN! Even those who go through IVF, the parents & the dr.s cannot make those embryos implant into the mother's womb so perfectly that life is sustained, ONLY GOD CAN! Miscarriages happen all the time for so many reasons, most unknown, but GOD created that life & ONLY HE DESERVES the RIGHT to end it! NO ONE ELSE!!

This whole pro-life pro-choice thing is far bigger than I think we realize! Please do not let fear & lies stop you from voting YES! Don't let anything stop you from praying that abortion will end & that those who have already made that choice will find healing & salvation. Don't let Satan fill your mind & heart with lies. Seek God's Word. Stand up for TRUTH! Protect those who cannt protect themselves! (Proverbs 31:8)

I pray blessings to you all! I pray I was able to speak truth in love & that my passion didn't overshadow the love I really have for EVERY human life. :) Have a blessed week & never doubt how much JESUS LOVES YOU!

Fun @ the state fair!!!

2011-10-24T11:36:00.001-05:00

Here are some pictures from our fabulous time at the state fair a couple weeks ago. As you will see we had an AMAZINGLY fun time! My wonderful husband took off work 1/2 a day & precious niece came home from college to go with us. I love doing fun things together as a family & making memories! Hope you enjoy!

The bumble bee ride is always the 1st ride we hit every year for the last 3 years :)

We felt like Superman flying around! Below is my husband & nephew Dylan.

Here's my darling niece Britany with the boys.

There's a SUPER HUGE slide that's always a big hit with my boys! I think they did it at least 5x!

The log ride was our favorite! They actually let Rylan ride the 1st time down.

Good daddy riding many of the rides with the boys!

Keller didn't get to ride anything, well except the Ferris Wheel (later on), but he had fun people watching & hanging out.

Brady was SO scared he started crying but I got him to laughing & he wanted to ride it again!

As you see below we hit up the log ride again, this time with daddy. Love our faces!

Bumper cars are always a hit! ;P

Brady rode this dropping ride in TX this summer & cried the whole time! But this time he laughed the whole time! He's getting VERY brave!

I married a sweet daddy!

All of my boys on the ferris wheel

And per tradition, we always end the night with the petting zoo!

We had such a great time! What things do you like to do with your family?

The Laundry Low Down!

2011-10-19T13:50:00.001-05:00

I don't know about y'all, but I DETESTED laundry! With 5 people in my family it's never ending! I mean it's me, my Mr., & three boys ages 6, 3, & 11 months, so it had become quite consuming!

I was doing on average about 2 loads almost every day & it became so tedious that I would just skip that day & the next day I had double my work so I put it off until I had a HUGE pile on my couch. I remember feeling so discouraged that I let myself get so behind.

During the boys' nap/quiet time I decided to tackle it. I turned on the TV to catch up on my DVR & went to work. I was amazed at how quick it went by. I mean I actually sorted, folded, hung up, & put away about 8 loads in what seemed like no time at all! That's when my new plan came into place!

Instead of doing laundry everyday, I have 1 BIG day, with 2 smaller days. I start on Sunday afternoon washing & emptying them on one of our couches once they've dried. We go to church on Sunday nights so I don't even bother folding them because we can usually get pretty busy. I continue the washing, drying dumping cycle on Monday morning in between waking up, getting breakfast fixed, & doing school.

I pull out any clothes that need to be hung up & lay them over the top of our other couch sorted by each person. Around 1pm it's nap/quiet time & all the boys are shoved away for about 2 hours. This is when the Laundry Low Down begins!!

I put on some music or a TV show on the DVR & attack the massive pile all at once! I forgot to take a picture of the massive pile, but below is my sorting process.

This is couch #2 where you can see our hanging clothes laid out on the top sorted by person. On the cushions are mine & my husband's folded clothes sorted by which drawers or shelf they'll go in.

Here's our coffee table where I sort the boys' folding clothes.

When the massive pile has been depleted I sit down & hang the clothes on the back of the couch & when the boys are up enjoying their snacks & playing I immediately put away all of the clothes. Then I am free from clothes laundry unless something comes up unexpected. Wednesday I do all of our dirty towels & rags which is usually about 1 or 2 loads & Friday I wash our bedding.

The only MAJOR laundry day is Monday is it's no longer overwhelming. It's actually kind of peaceful because I'm getting alone time to watch something non-kid related :) & I'm getting a lot of work done quickly & efficiently! Although I do admit, I still long for a nice laundry room with shelves, a sink, ironing board etc. But until then I have found a system that works for me!

So what's your laundry low down like?

What the BLOG is this??!!??

2011-10-10T15:31:00.001-05:00

Heh! Pretty good title right?!

When I first started this blog it was my everything kind of blog. Family, homeschooling, life, relationships, journey with Jesus, etc etc etc. Since becoming a full fledge homeschooling momma I realized I needed a blog completely devoted to homeschool, but I didn't know what to do with this one.

Over the last few years my life has changed SO much! I went from being a working mother of one to a homeschool/stay at mom of 3 & counting (no I am not pregnant now, but we do want more).

I have had the great honor of having some incredible best friends to them disappearing, completely reopening old wounds of my issues with females (that's a whole other blog, can't dive into that now).

I went from being so ashamed of my past I carried an intense amount of fear of people finding out to being completely set free & healed by my Redeemer & speaking openly about it when the opportunity arose.

I went from living emotionally to living spiritually & understanding the real meaning of Ephesians 6:12 & battling the emotions constantly.

I have grown leaps & bounds in my Christian walk & now see I still have leaps & bounds to go. I have a new hunger & desire for God & His Word that can't be fulfilled by Bible studies & church alone. I want to truly eat the Bread of God, to drink His cup of Living Water, to not settle for the Southern Baptist status quo of Christianity!

I have a new desire to be a Proverbs 31 woman. To be a 1 Peter 3 wife. To be the mom my kids deserve. To be the walking testimony of how much Jesus loves us.

So that's what this blog is going to be. My Jesus Journey. Just me sharing my quest to become that Proverbs 31 woman, that 1 Peter 3 wife, my quest to be all Christ wants me to be & to not settle for anything less.

I want to be open & honest about my struggles with food, my wounds, my accomplishments, my failures, my fears, my relationships, my life.

I want to share recipes, my job as a housewife, tips from cleaning to having a stronger marriage, to share love & laughter & maybe even some tears (ok probably A LOT of tears because I am a crier). *smiles*

I hope you follow along with me & encourage me, converse with me, share your own tips, struggles, joys etc. God didn't mean for us to be alone in life. As Christ followers we are family. The STRONGEST family there is because we are covered by the Blood of Christ.

Blessings to you all have a wonderful week!

180 MOVIE

2011-09-27T12:08:00.000-05:00

If this doesn't make you think, NOTHING WILL!!!

Warning! Pictures of the Holocaust

http://youtu.be/7y2KsU_dhwI

No Greater Love

2011-09-19T10:54:00.000-05:00

John 15:12“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. 16You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. 17These things I command you, so that you will love one another.

These verses are pretty powerful. We know that Scripture tells us that LOVE is the GREATEST thing we can do.

Do. It's a verb, an ACTION. It's easy to say we love others, but it's a whole other thing to actually show that love. Jesus said the greatest love is to lay down our lives for one another. He did it in the greatest capacity by giving His own sacred life for us to save us from our sins so that we may live in freedom & share THIS love with others so they can know the same love.

Jesus isn't suggesting we love others, He's COMMANDING us to! If we call ourselves Christians we HAVE to love others because it's in our divine bloodline we inheritted as adopted children of the Most High God. So it should be easy to do right?

In today's world it's so easy to be consumed with ourselves, our families, our jobs, our friends. OUR. OUR. OUR. MY. MY. MY. ME. ME. ME. I. I. I.

I don't know about you, but I am so grateful Jesus wasn't selfish.

So how can we show LOVE to others? How do we "LAY DOWN OUR LIVES" for others?

Maybe it's by forgiving someone who never apologized. Calling a friend you haven't spoken to for some time & not just commenting on their Facebook page.

Maybe it's by giving the homeless guy on the corner $5 or a cheap meal from McDonald's. Volunteering to help with the childcare at your church. Cooking a meal for someone for no reason at all.

Maybe laying down our lives is by offering to keep some one's kids so they can have sometime to their self or a date with their husband. Visiting a home-bound member of your church. Sending a care package to someone in the military whether you know them or not.

Maybe it's giving above your tithe even though you don't have the funds, but you're going to trust God anyway. It could be to spend extra time playing with your kids & playing what they want you to play.

Maybe it's giving away the stuff you don't use anymore to someone who does instead of selling it, even though you may need the money. Laying down your life could be sending a nice card to someone in the mail just to say you love them, you're thinking about them, you're praying for them.

Maybe it's just giving a simple smile to a complete stranger. Or being extra kind to the cashier or waiter who is doing a horrible job & being rude, then tipping them well anyway.

Laying down your life could be sending $50 to a ministry that specializing in stopping sex-trafficking, or to your local CPC, sending it to K-Love, to a friend you know who needs it, or just sticking it on a shelf in a grocery store & praying God sends the right person to find it & then trusting that He will.

Maybe laying down your life is making love to your husband when you're just not in the mood, he hasn't been romantic, & you honestly have a headache, but you know that it'll mean a lot to him.

It could be inviting someone who's not in you circle of friends to a get together, or on a playdate with other moms. Maybe it's cutting a neighbor's grass, bringing them cookies, inviting them to church, or just stopping by to say hey even when you honestly don't have the time. You make the time.

Let's face it, there are so many ways we can lay down our lives for someone else, to genuinely show them that we love them, to bear the fruit of the Spirit, to sow the seed of Christ that He has planted into us.

My prayer is that all of us who call ourselves Christians start acting more like Christ & less like ourselves. I know without a doubt I have not loved like I should, like I'm commanded, but now I can move forward & starting doing this kind of love, instead of just having the intention to.

May you all have a blessed week & please share a comment of how someone has laid down their life you recently or how you have done it for someone else. Let's encourage one another in that LOVE!

NEW BLOG

2011-05-06T12:37:00.000-05:00

Well to make a long story short, we are FINALLY back in our house!!! :) YEA!!!!

So now that I'm back I am trying to get back into the groove of our life!

This blog will be dedicated to my personal journeys with God & I now have a NEW blog completely dedicated to our homeschooling! Whoo hoo!!! So PLEASE go follow me at Schoolin' The Boys!

Thanks!!!

Ashley

Letters H & V & Valentines!!!!

2011-02-14T19:33:00.000-06:00

Last week began discussing Valentine's & how it's a holiday for us to remind others of how much we love them & more importantly that God loves them. We started the week off with the letter H for Heart. The boys used these little Hearts for EVERYTHING all week long! They made patterns with them & sorted them by color & size.

Brady used them to count while he did his addition.

They glued the Hearts to a letter H.

Decorated their Valentine bags with them.

And Brady used them to decorate the Valentines he made for all his friends.

As we talked about love we focused on the Verses Matthew 22:37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’³⁸ This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’" We discussed many ways we could show love to others & how we can show God how we can show God how much we love Him. I really enjoyed talking about God's love! In fact I NEVER get tired of about of the love of my Savior & Bridegroom...but that's a whole other blog not in homeschooling :)

Our H foods were of course Hot dogs & Ham & cheese sandwiches.For the letter V we didn't have any foods except what I called our special Valentine meal of Heart shaped pancakes. We have some Venison, but I never got around to thawing it out to cook :)

For our V craft the boys made Vases.

I drew different kinds of flowers& let the boys color them. We cut them out & pasted them with stems to fill the Vases. I thought they turned out SUPER cute!

Today we concluded our Valentine lesson with a Valentine party with some of our favorite home school friends!

We went to Kidz Rock which has many inflatables for the kids to go crazy on.

And arcade games & outside playgrounds.

The kiddos played, us mommies got to chat, we talked about love & the lil ones exchanged Valentines.

We ate some yummy food & had a fabulous time! I am SO incredibly thankful that God has brought some sweet homeschooling mommies to me! It's nice to have some friends who understand what I am going through in this area of my life.

This week we are reviewing our letters up to this point so no big crafts. Hopefully this break will finally let me upload a blog on Tot School...Rylan's special stuff :)

Super Mom vs Abiding Mom

2011-02-08T08:55:00.000-06:00

This is from the blog Confessions of a Homeschooler but ALL mommas should read this chart & see where we fit in on things! Pretty awesome!!!!

Today’s Challenge:

As a minister to your family, what is God’s plan for you as a homeschooler and parent? Take some time today to remind yourself who you are in Christ. (I realize this is geared towards mom’s, but really can be applied to any parent.)

Super Mom	Abiding Mom
Does	Is (Psalm 46:10)
Tries to impress others	Pleases the Lord (Eph. 5:10, Proverbs 29:25)
Is controlled by an agenda (curriculum, schedule, etc)	Is controlled by the Holy Spirit: (Gal. 5:22-26) (Uses curriculum & schedules as tools for orderliness so she's more free to follow the spirit)
Her self worth is found in her accomplishments (clean house, perfect kids, the perfect bulletin boards, etc.)	Her self worth is found in an accurate view of who she is in Christ Jesus (Eph 2:10)
Her peace is found in the “perfect” environment	Her peace is found in Jesus in the midst of any storm (Is 26:3)
She is discouraged by failure	Failure reminds her that God's strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9-10)
She expects perfection from herself and others	She practices grace with herself and others (Eph 4:32)
She teaches her kids to be good	She teaches her kids to be Godly (Proverbs 22:6)
She is frustrated with her lack of spiritual fruit	She abides in Christ and bears much fruit (John 15:5)
She does things with her children	She builds a relationship with her children (Deut 6:6-7)
Her perspective is based on what is seen	Her perspective is based on what is unseen (Col 3:2)
She chooses quantity of activities	She chooses the most excellent Way (I Cor 13)
Her kids may recall how busy she always is.	Her children rise and call her blessed. (Prov. 31:28)

Keller laughing @ patty cake

2011-02-07T23:45:00.000-06:00

Keller laughing as Britany plays patty cake with him :)

Letters C & M (my favortie week so far!!!)

2011-02-07T13:08:00.000-06:00

First of all let me say a BIG thanks to ALL the AAHHH-MAZING mommy bloggers out there who dedicate so much time into sharing their ideas for the rest of us!!! Because of these ladies I'm able to do so many fun learning activities with my boys & they inspire me to create some things on my own!

We began last week reviewing the letter C. I took this time to introduce Brady to the CH sound as well because we are about to cover that in our reading lessons. We also talked about how the letter C can also make a "S" sound like in the words City, Celery, & Cereal. Brady thinks the letter C is a tricky Cat! (dont ask)

Last year I read "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" to the boys & ever since then it has been a BIG hit in our household! Both big boys can quote it word for word! So they were pretty ecstatic when we read it during "school" time & made Caterpillar C's!

Rylan was incredibly impressed by the little fuzzy Craft balls we used. So I came up with a "Tot School" activity that I'll post tomorrow! :)

We also made Chocolate Chip Cookies in the shape of the letter C. This was quite messy, but of course that made the boys love it even more! Rylan sang the Cookie Monster song, "C is for Cookie, it's good enough for me" the whole time :) I wish I would've gotten it on Camera, but my hands were covered in gooey dough!

While our Cookies were baking we read the book, "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie." I HIGHLY recommend all the "If You Give A..." books!!! We also took time to talk about their Cousins & named all of the ones whose names started with a C: Caleb, Connor, Cameron, Christian, & Cody; Brady was a little upset that his Cousin Kaelin's name started with a K & not a C.

We also discussed how Jesus is the Christ & though I know the deep meaning of Christ is above his lil head, I still enjoy planting the seed in him & sowing it, because one day he will understand & that is the ultimate goal!

Our other C activities included lots Counting with our addition, playing with Cards, eating lots of C foods: Cookies, Carrots, Chips, Celery, Chicken, Corn...bet you can guess which food was Brady's favorite!

The boys even had a lunch of Chicken, Chips, & Corn while they watched Cars. I was informed this day that I was "The Best Mom EVER!!!" :D

Brady couldn't have been more thrilled to begin the letter M when he saw we would be doing our Math lesson with M & M's!!! He sorted them by colors & counted them, did his addition with them, made patterns & shapes with them & we even brought the M &M's into our language lesson & traced our M's with M & M's.

I used to have a M & M Math book from when I taught 4th grade, but have seen it since then :( I will have to purchase it again because my students LOVED it!

We spent that afternoon reading "If You Take A Mouse To The Movies" & which led us to watching the Movie "A Mickey Mouse Christmas" while we ate some popcorn & M &M's with Chocolate Milk. (Notice the Mixing of C's & M's??? ;P) We also purposely Made a Mess so we could Clean it up. For dinner we had a special M Meal of Mini Meatloaf Muffins & Mashed potatoes. We also played ALL of their Musical instruments & made up silly songs together.

We focused our Bible story to Moses & the 10 Commandments & made our Mt. Sinai out of the letter M, added some clouds & of course Moses too!

We reviewed the Commandments & gave examples of each (with the exception of adultery) & I explained to my best ability what Mercy was & that even though we often make Mistakes, God shows us Mercy & He forgives us; which is why we should show Mercy to others.

Letters O & T with addition

2011-02-01T18:42:00.000-06:00

Last week we reviewed the letter O & made some super cute Owls! Rylan joined in the fun this time!

They painted their O's added a triangle with 2 green circles for the eyes. This was also an opportunity to teach Rylan some colors & shapes, though he didn't care for it as much as he did the painting! I had to pry the paint brush out of his hand!

Our O food was an orange of course! Brady wasn't too keen on trying an Olive! We talked a lot about the Ocean & our vacation to the beach when saw a lot of different sea creatures up close! Too close for me! A baby shark swam 5 feet away from were we were! We also looked in books & talked about the different animals that live in the Ocean. After we made our Owls we learned a new word: NOCTURNAL because most Owls sleep in the day & hunt for food at night. Another new word was OAR. It was in his dictionary & he couldn't understand why they put a paddle under the O because paddle starts with P! He cracks me up sometimes with his simple logical sense of things.

Brady also reviewed the letter T & made a cute Tree in the shape of a T.

He colored the Trunk & branches, then used a sponge to paint green leaves on it & before the paint could dry, he added fake grass we bought a while back to add some Texture!

Brady came up with a Ton of T words! As you can see by his list some of his VERY favorite Things start with T. Trains Thomas & Toby made the list & Brady wasn't too happy I ran out of room to write Tow Mater from Disney's Cars :) Our story came from the Bible, we Talked about the Trees in the Garden of Eden & the 1st sin. Brady remembered most of it which makes me happy! We also Talked a lot about Trust & Telling the Truth. Our T food was his favorite vegetable, a Tomato! I had considered working on Telling Time for math, but I didn't want to interrupt our addition that we had already started.

As you can see he did VERY well on his on. I like to buy the $1 workbooks to assist with our Singapore book we typically use. Brady likes it too because as he says, "I get to work with my friends." Meaning his favorite characters. :)

He also uses his Cuisinaire Rods to help count the numbers & then add them all together. I'm amazed at how quick he caught on. I'm hoping he's good at math & likes it. I never did! One of my main goals in homeschooling is to make learning fun so here's to praying I can find fun ways to teach the stuff I don't like so much.

A Gift from God & some Kari Jobe!

2011-01-31T09:44:00.000-06:00

As a new mommy again I find myself being very busy with the same stuff, never getting it all done. My days are full of breastfeeding & caring for an infant, potting training & wrangling a toddler, & homeschooling an almost 6 year old who is very smart & always has a million questions or things he wants to tell me. Then there's my house with one problem after another, still waiting to be fixed, the never ending laundry & dishes on top of other house duties, caring for a dog I could live without but my kids can't. Trying to be a parent & a friend to my 20 year old niece who lives with us & I assure trying to find a balance in letting her make her own decisions, good or bad, & trying to guide her isn't an easy task! Then there's being a wife to a busy husband trying to further his career & being a mentor/leader to teen moms, & most importantly my relationship with Jesus! Oh wait, I forgot about the ongoing battle of food I have & trying to lose weight.

I'm sure I've left some things out :)

Now please know I am NO WAY COMPLAINING!!! I LOVE my life! I have 3 amazing boys, a wonderful niece who is a GODSEND! A husband whom I love &that works hard for his family, a ministry I'm proud to be a part of, & a roof over our heads that WILL be fixed...eventually. All are great blessings, but sometimes Momma just needs a BREAK!!!!

Well here's God's special lil gift for me...my niece, Britany, offered to watch ALL 3 boys Friday so I could go shopping with my friend Karen. That's 2 gifts right there! The weather...well it was a BEAUTIFUL spring day in JANUARY!!! That should count as 3 gifts right there :) Our day was going great! I was out of the house, with a good friend, shopping & actually finding some things for myself, good conversation; couldn't have planned a better outing for myself!

So we decided to eat outside at Corner Bakery because the day was just getting more beautiful by the minute! As we sit down we notice a group of about 10 people eating next to us. They dressed pretty eclectic/rockish & I told Karen the girl in the headband looked REEEEEAAAALLLLLYYY familiar! For the life of me I couldn't figure out who she was or how I knew her. Karen checked her phone then looked at me with widen eyes & asked if I thought the girl was Kari Jobe. To our utter surprise & great delight IT WAS!!!!

Kari had really Tweeted that she was in Jackson & that's how we knew without a doubt that one of our FAVE worship leaders was eating right next to us. We were like giddy lil girls :) Kari was incredibly sweet, took pics with us & autographed my CD that just so happened to be listening to in my car! God-thing...ABSOLUTELY!

As if my day wasn't already wonderful, a nice gift from God to give this momma a break, He goes & puts a GIANT bow on top of the gift in the form of KARI JOBE!!!! How amazing is He!? I was also happy when my friend Marie showed up too! She sings a lot of Kari Jobe & I was thankful she was able to meet her as well.

I so wish I wouldn't have been such a "fan" & actually told Kari how much her songs mean to me! But I have a great sense that I'm going to get to meet her again one day & then I will actually tell her. Sunday night I was able to see her perform at a local church & it was an incredible night of worship! She has such a pure heart for the Lord; it's incredibly refreshing!

So now it's Monday & back to the usual chaotic busyness of Mommyhood, but with a great big smile on my face, feeling renewed & refreshed! All thanks to God, my Father, my loving Bridegroom who knows just what I need when I need it & throws in something special unexpectedly just for me....

Letters N & L

2011-01-18T09:36:00.000-06:00

I know I'm late on this post but last was CRAZY! I had my 1st sinus migraine and I pray it was my last! :/

On the home school front we reviewed the letters N & L.

For the letter in our focus was Numbers. We went on a number hunt at Walmart and Brady wrote down all the Numbers he saw in his little Notebook. We worked on skip counting by 10s and 5s and worked on some early addition skills too. Our N food was Nachos (my favorite) and we talked about different ways we can be Nice to others and Not be Naughty.

The Letter L represented Letters. Brady is almost finished with his Kindergarten reading book! So we've used the last couple of weeks to review. Our verse was Luke 10:27 "Jesus answered, 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Which also tied into our "Nice" lesson. His L food was a Lollipop, but thought it was "SO COOL" to eat ABC's & 123's because it had Letters and Numbers in it. :) The Little things that kids Like LoL...and speaking of LoL...we also talked about things that make us Laugh...my favorite was my kiddos, Brady's was Tom & Jerry.

For our craft I cut many Numbers and Letters out of newspaper and Brady had to sort them and glue the Numbers to the Letter N and the Letters on the L.

Pictures were taken on my phone so the quality isnt too great. This week we're taking off to the great state of Texas to visit my mom & sister! have a blessed week!!!

A FUN Dr. Visit

2011-01-11T18:14:00.001-06:00

I love being a mom! Scratch that! I LOVE LOVE LOVE being a MOMMY! :)

Today K-Dawg had his 1st set of vaccinations and against my better judgement I took ALL 3 boys with me ALONE!!! Not sure what my thinking was, though I'm pretty sure I wasn't thinking due to the lack of sleep and the constant caring of 3 small children. But I have to admit I'm glad I did! We had a good time surprisingly.

I was COMPLETELY terrified of the bigs touching things sick kids had touched and bringing home strep or the flu. So I said to ask my prayer warriors to say a special prayer for that! We actually made it early and the bigs stayed in the infant room with me and didn't complain that I didn't let them out to see the fish or play with the germy kids on the other side of the waiting area. They played very well together in our little, secluded area.

Keller weighed in at 12.7 lbs and measured 24 inches long and is in the 75th percentile :) He smiled and cooed at his dr and the dr said Keller was perfect in every way....but I already knew that :)

While we waited for the nurse to come in we read 3 books and sang songs. the bigs, especially Rylan, started to get antsy which led us to the video below. I love my kiddos! All their lil sillies too!

Letters Y & Q

2011-01-07T10:39:00.001-06:00

Well we are the home stretch of Kindergarten and of course I have VERY mixed emotions! Happy to see how much Brady is learning, but a little bit sad because he's growing up so fast! Even though he's known all of his letters and their sounds for a long time I have decided to review him on them and use this as a way to get Rylan involved and to have some learning fun with Brady. We are doing this on top of our regular reading and math lessons and using the weekly letters to learn new words, play games, do science, and some social studies type projects. So check back every week to see what we've come up with :)

The boys glued Yarn to a Yellow Y. Rylan's is on the left & Brady's on the right. Brady & I also discussed words that start with Y & we talked about the one's he didn't know & looked for pictures of them in his 1st Dictionary. I purposely made lunch or dinner with something that began with a Y, but it took him a bit to guess Yellow corn :) Momma doesn't do Yams! And of course he had Yogurt at lunch one day. Brady was also extremely happy that Yoshi from Super Mario starts with a Y too and reminds me of this whenever he plays :)

Rylan coloring a letter Y from his book. you can also see textured Y we trace with our fingers & a ball of Yarn we used for our art & to play a game of toss with.

Brady using Cuisinare Rods to make Ys. This book also helps with colors & counting & many other fun activities.

Brady tossing Quarters onto the letter Q.

After practicing his printing we put the Quarters under the paper so he could rub the imprint of the Quarter.

The boys also painted Qs with Q-tips & happy for me, they didn't even make a mess!!

Their final products with our list of Q words.

After school was over today we went out to lunch and ate some Quesadillas! MMMMM MMMM MMMMM!!!!

Communcation or lack there of

2010-11-19T21:02:00.000-06:00

To say the least the last month or say has been crazy! I wasnt too busy just simply too tired and too pregnant too emotional LoL! Lovely hormones! Well 1st let me say my sweet baby K is here and is perfect! I had a sweet shower and was completely overwhelmed by love! I will post more on these later when I can sit down and upload photos to share with them. Hopefully this wont take another month!

My pregnancy went by incredibly fast to me. I was lying on the table getting prepped for my c-section and it hit me just how fast it went by. It didnt seem like it was time to have Keller yet, like some how it all rushed up on me, 9 months are gone and boy #3 was here. This of course lead me to a lot of alone time to rest, but of course with the ever changing hormones it led me to a lot of thinking about a lot of things and probably a lot of over-analyzing as well.

It's no surprise to anyone who knows me that I wear my heart on sleeve. If I'm sad, happy, angry, silly, etc etc it's typically not hard to tell. I used to keep all of my feelings locked in side never expressing what I was going through which ultimately led to a lot of depression. Then I went through a stage where I let my emotions control me and that was absolutely ignorant and no good either. So I've had to find a balance and sometimes that's easier said than done.

I try to be a open book. If I'm in a bad mood, I always let my husband, niece, anyone near me know so they dont take my bad attitude personally. Communication has changed so much in the last decade thanks to text messaging, Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, blogs, etc. Sometimes it's easier to just shoot someone a text message when you just have a simple question than to call someone and have actual conversation that may last longer than needed. And let's face it, sending someone a birthday card is a thing of the past it seems. It's not official unless you post on Facebook for everyone else to see.

Somehow with all this technological communication has allowed people to keep in touch with more people, but it also seems as if it has driven a wedge and built walls between others. Now Im not saying any of these things are bad. Facebook alone has saved my scrap booking by allowing me to immediately upload pics and things my kids do as they do them. It has also helped my mom who we dont get to see often feel like she's very involved in our lives and can witness all of her grandkids growing up without leaving her home.

Then of course there's the aging process. As we grow and our lives change the things around us change. Our views, morals, beliefs, friends, kids, jobs, and so on. Sometimes it's hard for me personally to let go of things. I like things to be nice, simple, non-confrontational, drama-free, and easy as possible. Especially my relationships with others. But what Ive learned this past year is that they more often than not dont really go that way. People are different. As we each change our relationships change.

So friends come and go whether there is a reason for it or not. I for one, have got to learn to let go try not to take it personally. Maybe in the cycle of change the good Lord will bring those relationships back full circle. He's done it before so I'm certain He'll do it again.

And in the midst of the change He also brings forth new relationships. So in the end it's all good. Everything in life has the ability to make or break us, but we are the determining factors in that. When have to to choose to lean on Him and let Him guide us through, showing us more mercy and grace when we fail, helping us to admit failure and apologize when necessary.

In the midst of all the communication or lack there of, God is always there, just a prayer away. So in hopes to be more like Christ I hope I can be the same for others. That I can be just a phone call, text message, Facebook post or Tweet away when someone wants me :)

Home School Blogs I ♥!!!

2010-10-12T08:45:00.000-05:00

So Sunday evening I went to my fave craft site for the kiddos and stumbled upon some awesome blogs of other homeschooling mommies. I havent had a chance to go through all of them, but what I have seen just makes my heart want to dance.

Confessions of a Homeschooler is AMAZING!!! She is so organized!! Has tons of free printables, lesson ideas for lil ones, preschool-2nd grade. I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend checking this one out!!!

Here are some others that I havent had a lot of time to explore, but decided to follow cause they seemed a lot like me in one way or another! If you get a chance to explore any of these blogs PLEASE let me know what you think!

Sippy Cup Central
Weird Unsocialized Homeschoolers
Homeschooling in Heels
Homeschool Success
I Can Teach My Child :This is the next one I plan to explore :)
The Mantooth Family Story-Home School & Beyond

Dont forget to let me know what you think of them & if you've found any others you think I may like! Have a blessed day!

No time to worry!

2010-10-07T10:20:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I let myself get overwhelmed and worry which isn't very uncommon for any human, but many many times I feel SO silly afterward! Truth of the matter is God says to cast our cares on Him and He WILL take care of us! So why waste precious time and energy worrying instead of praying and giving it over to the Lord?

Our house issueS: Praying they'll pay to fix them, if I cant come straight home from the hospital after Keller is born because they're working on it-NO BIG DEAL! I have a place to go & BONUS; my house will be fixed :) So what's the big deal if baby K doesn't have well painted, glammed up decorated nursery like all my friends' babies? Like one friend told me, he wont even know! Besides he'll be sleeping in the room with us for the first few months anyway. Grand evaluation-NO WORRIES!

Diaper expenses: NONE! No use in stressing having two in diapers, it wont change anything. Instead I'm praying for that too! Rylan has pee peed in the potty some and 2 of my sweet friends decided to throw me a casual baby shower so I can get some diapers & other things I need for baby K. And if I don't get any diapers and some how some way we cant afford any, another friend gave me a HUGE box of cloth diapers to try if I'd like...though I'll admit I'd rather be lazy & have the disposable ones & don't think I'll have to resort to the cloth ones, but my point is my kiddos bottoms will be covered!!! Grand evaluation-NO WORRIES!

Rylan in MMO: DROP OUT :D!! Yes that's right I let my 2 year old drop out of preschool LOL I cant help but laugh at that! I ACTUALLY love having him here!(No real surprise to me!) Even the days when he doesn't want to corporate while I home school Brady, Id still rather have him here than somewhere else he really doesn't want to be. It seems like Brady was just a baby not so long ago & now he's 5 1/2, reading, & becoming such a sweet young boy who loves Jesus, trains, cars, & has an INCREDIBLE memory & imagination! Rylan's already 2 1/2 & now #3 will be here soon! Time goes by too fast to stress about having my child in preschool. Brady loved it, Ry not so much, plus we are now saving $80 a month :) Most days Ry wants to color or draw while I'm working with Brady, he LOVES to read with us & even grabs books on his own to "read." Being the crazy momma I am, I am willing let him paint, draw, & do all the fun messy art & science stuff with us. We sit and play with blocks, Lego's, & puzzles together. He loves to sing along to Brady's Bible verse CD. So I feel incredibly silly for even worrying about taking him out of preschool. It just wasn't for him & he is getting so much from being home with us and getting to participate with the 2 & 3 year olds at our home school co-op. Grand evaluation-NO WORRIES!

I am sure something else will come up that I'll worry about before I really just stop & breathe & lift it up to God, and I'm very sure this will happen more often than not. But it is my hope instead of letting the worries get ahead of me that I get ahead of them & give it all to Jesus to help me through :)

Isn't it AMAZING to have a Savior who cares about all the silly things that make us worry! And it's even more amazing that He completely takes care of us in spite of our silliness.

Good News vs Bad news-Prayers PLZ!!

2010-09-25T15:48:00.000-05:00

Good News: After MANY years of frustration with foundation issues we FINALLY have an agent from the Home Owners Warranty coming tomorrow to begin the process of FINALLY getting our foundation fixed!!! PTL!!!

Bad News: Was told we may have to move out for a week while the house is being repaired & Im already 6 1/2 weeks from delivery & I cant even paint the nursery until it's fixed :/

Prayer request: Pray that it all goes smoothly & that the house is fixed BEFORE baby K comes whether the nursery is painted or not! I dont need anymore stress during this pregnancy!

Good News: Gestational diabetes seems to be gone, protein in urine is gone, & blood pressure has been good!

Bad News: starting to swell, experiencing some tingling/numbness in fingers, had some contractions here and there & not Braxton Hicks, the REAL ones! I've had 3 sweet friends in the recent months who had their babies early which meant they had to stay in NICU for a few weeks & another friend who is currently on bed rest & after seeing what these mommas went through with their babies, I REALLY do not want to have Keller early!

Prayer Request: Pray the last of this pregnancy goes just as it needs to without any complications for me and especially my baby!

Thanks!!! I covet ALL prayers!!!

2 months left & NO diapers!

2010-09-13T14:16:00.000-05:00

So it really hit me today that in 2 short months I will be a momma of 3 beautiful boys! THREE!!! I didnt freak out at first til I went into the nursery and started assessing the situation: it needs to be painted, I need to bring the baby clothes down from the attic to wash, which led to me realizing he doesnt have very many clothes since his brothers were both born in the opposite season so I really do need to do some shopping, which led to the other things we need to buy before he gets here, OMG!!! DIAPERS!!!

Diapers! Diapers! Diapers! Why havent I been buying diapers??? Oh yes I have been, but for Rylan! He started out doing good with potty training, but things got hectic and I stopped pushing it and now he doesnt't seem very interested at all. So am I doomed to have 2 in diapers!?!???

So from there fell a snowball of things we need that I didnt fully realize we needed and a list of all the things that need to be done which of course led me to the list of things I already have to do and other things that I need to buy....snowball rolling fast and getting BIGGER!!!!

DEEP BREATH!!! Ok, everything will be ok! I know this! I've never freaked out before, not even when I was pregnant with Brady and put on early bed rest and had NOTHING done, not a shower I could attend, or a nursery put together. But my sister-in-law and friends from our old church in Clifton, MS came to my rescue.

They gave me a shower in my house since I couldnt leave and even decorated the nursery for me. Stressing about it never entered my mind because I could only focus on trying to keep Brady in my womb for as long as possible. But now I'm feeling some pressure and a tad bit overwhelmed.

Three boys, two in diapers, won't be cheap! We still have a few things and clothes we need to purchase for Keller, and we are waiting for our Home Warranty folks to send the funds and get the ball rolling so we can FINALLY get our foundation fixed etc etc.

So I'm going to take a BIG DEEP BREATH again :) and trust without a doubt God is going to provide everything we need! I dont cling to Proverbs 3:5 & 6 for nothing! I know it's true & I know I can trust Him!

Freak out over....for now :P

Keller in 3D!

2010-09-11T13:09:00.000-05:00

28 weeks 1 day gestation! I love this lil boy SO much! I cant wait to hold him in my arms!

All snuggled up inside
He was smiling a lot just like Rylan did during his 3d sonogram
Hiding behind his arm & leg
Resting

Christianity is a TEAM sport!

2010-08-31T09:59:00.001-05:00

Well leave it to God to have me pour out my heart and then reveal His truths (well some of them) to me :) Almost immediately after my friend blog I received a text from a pal I hadnt really talked to in awhile & it was just a simple bit of encouragement. Which reminded me of a saying that I love, "The smallest deed is better than the greatest intention." Her little text gave me such peace that night which led me to praying for her and her family.

The very next day in what would seem to be random, except I dont believe in random things cause God orchestrates everything, I ran into another gal I hadnt seen in a while we just began chatting and she just asked me to pray for her because she had been in a funk lately, not wanting to go to church even though she loved it but everytime she saw certain people she just felt discouraged. She really couldnt explain her feelings but I was able to share with her what God had been working on me in the last few months. That it isnt PEOPLE we wrestle with. That Ephesians 6:12 says For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Even with ourselves, we are constantly in a spiritual war where we constantly have to fight against our own sin nature and others. Satan would love nothing more than to keep this lady from church and from other Christian women. I was INCREDIBLY excited to see her at church last Sunday! :)

I could write about EVERYTHING and EVERYONE God has put before me since I poured out everything on here, but I wont...I'll just say that I see what God needed to do in me.

I used to be a professed loner but had gotten too attached to needing people. It's sometimes easier to call up your best friend and vent or brag about what is going on in your life than to lift it up to God first. I had even began relying on my friends to share my feeling with over my own husband. My thought was, "Well they understand me better cause they are women and he is a man." And I know my gal pals can relate to my feelings better cause they're women too, but my husband should know me better than them. I need to share stuff with him so he can pray for me too and know what's going on in my lil woman universe.

Ephesians 6:12 has really helped me not to take things too personally. Also listening to John Piper talk about making war against your own sin. Yes people say and do things that hurt us, but we have to remember they are also in their own spiritual battle and instead of getting too angry with them, we have got to PRAY for them and the battle they're in. This has also taught me PATIENCE! Slowly and surely anyway ;P

Instead of making an immediate decision as to why certain things happen or don't happen I just have to lift up these things to God, pray for the other person, for myself and for the battle we are in. Satan has already been defeated so there is no need to allow him to sneak in and make me are anyone else stumble.

Bro David said something VERY profound Sunday night, "Christianity is a TEAM sport!"

We are not in this world alone! He has made us apart of ONE body, the body of Christ. HE has blessed us with brothers and sisters to sharpen us, to pray for us, to even be our hero when the time comes. Bro. David spoke about King David and how when he went to kill Goliath he had 5 stones, but he only needed to use one.

Later on descendants of Goliath came to kill David and David being a mighty warrior with 4 stones left could have taken them out! But God had a plan for 4 of David's friends to be his hero and kill these descendants for David instead. This probably strengthened their relationships.

So God began to remind me of some ladies who had been my heroes in the last few months. During the most HORRIBLE time of my pregnancy weeks 7-9 when I couldn't even get our of bed or leave the toilet God sent a sweet neighbor to watch my kids for me, my husband missed work and my niece gave up her personal time @ college to come & help me. Others checked in a lot and sent me texts reminding me they were praying for me. And I must say, it wasn't as bad this round as with my previous pregnancies.

One night I was at church feeling completely alone and down trying to put on a happy face at TeenMops when God would orchestrate this AMAZING lady who I had never met before to be my prayer partner. She was my hero that night! I was able to cry to her & felt completely free to just be open and she has been an incredible prayer warrior for me since and God keeps using her and her husband to encourage me at various times.

God also shown me how I have been able to be a hero to others as well. All the while I think I was fighting one battle, it was something else, and God was bringing new people in my life through various things and teaching me so much more about myself and His Word. And He is still teaching me which is how it should be :)

I am so grateful I am not alone in this battle! God is always there and He has blessed me with some amazing brothers and sisters in Christ. All I have to do is reach up to Him, reach out in prayer for others and keep my armor on when enemy tries to lie to me and make me stumble.

Rylan's 1st day of MMO

2010-08-25T10:32:00.001-05:00

Well my lil fella is 2 & getting to go to Mom's Morning Out at our church 2 mornings a week. I'm very excited for him to get to play & learn with other lil kiddos his age. I'm extremely grateful that he has my friend Danielle for a teacher! She's a former elementary teacher & a momma of 2 boys so I know without a doubt he is going to learn a lot from her!

It is a lil bittersweet for me. He never throws a big fit when I leave him somewhere but he always gives me these pouty faces like he's saying, "I'd rather be with you mommy!" But I know he is going to love it and Brady & I need the lil break to focus on homeschooling. Plus when baby K gets here Im going to be even more thankful for those Tuesday & Thursday mornings with one less child to have a little break.

Mrs. Danielle told me he had a good day and was very sweet & even sang the Itsy Bitsy Spider for her. His only glitch was when he saw his cousin Britany who is also teaching MMO, out on the playground. Apparently he threw a big fit when he had to leave her, but otherwise had a great day.

Fading Friendships

2010-08-23T20:33:00.000-05:00

So for many many months I have had some struggles with some friendships. I cant say it's anyone's fault, just the way it is. This time last year if you wouldve asked I would have told I had 3 best friends. Each a Godly woman, each different, but yet so incredibly special to me in a different way. Since 2010 has began each of these friendships has pretty much fizzled for different reasons, some I cant even say why because I dont know why. Not that Im by any means enemies with them, just that there isnt much of a relationship at all anymore. Things are always kind and nice, but the relationship has definitely changed.

Ive cried out to God many many many times concerning these friendships plus some others that have faded away for one reason or another. I want to know WHY? WHAT HAPPENED? DID I DO SOMETHING? But God has only told me to not worry or be anxious about them. That He is here.

Of course He is absolutely ALL I need. If everyone, friends, family, my kids, husband etc were to leave me I would be ok. He is ALL I need. And I have to hold on to that.

He's giving me small answers and has shown me different things about these relationships and even more things about myself. Some I like; some I DO NOT :) It's never easy to have my bad stuff about pointed out! But my fervent prayer since February is that He will continue to grow me & change me because my ultimate goal in life is to be more like Him. So maybe the fading of these friendships is apart of it???

In high school I had 3 girl friends and the rest were guys. Guys are much more simpler and less catty. Plus MANY girls in school were very mean to me and did some very hateful things to me, ex pour coke in my back pack, steal books out of my locker, put gross things in my locker, spread awful and VERY hurtful rumors about me and so on. This plus a bad relationship with my mom taught me that females CANNOT be trusted. They may act like your friend but eventually they will just hurt you.

God really worked on me about these issues. I finally had my 1st girl best friend when I was 20, but give her 3 years and a bad boyfriend and she was a completely different person. This pushed me further away from wanting any close female relationships. When I rededicated my life to Christ I was too fearful of telling anyone about my past because I was sure they would hate me and yet that drove a bigger wedge between me and friendships with girls.

Slowly and surely God brought some awesome Christian ladies into my life that I was able to open up to and trust. This wall I had built up against women was surely beginning to fall. That college bff called me out of the blue a few years ago and apologized and completely opened up about the things she had been going through. God has truly mended that relationship and we try to see each other once a year, but we are always a text or call away to check in with and pray for :)

One of those best friends I had a year ago recently sent me a letter of apology and gratitude for something we went through in January. Things had been ok between us because both us being Christian women we knew we couldnt harbor bad feelings against each other, we had to let go and forgive and move on. I had been praying and praying for this friend. That God would just some how help me to let go entirely of everything, because the Bible says we wrestle against spirits and evil forces, NOT against flesh and blood.

As I was cleaning the kitchen one day she was HEAVILY on my heart and as I cleaned I just kept praying for her, for myself, for our relationship. I took a break to check the mail and there was her letter. I just sat down and cried tears of PURE joy! Her letter was everything I had been praying for! God heard my cries and healed me and this relationship. Slowly she and I are talking more and though our friendship wont ever be the same, I know without one doubt it will be MUCH better than before, because I know Christ has grown each of us in the last 8 months in many areas and this rift has brought about some things in myself that I didnt want to see, but needed to be convicted of. So it was all worth it!

Now the other relationships have changed not because of any rift, no argument or disagreement, at least that Im aware of, and to be honest that bugs me the most! It's easier if you can pinpoint a reason, but here again, I truly believe this is God teaching me a lesson and wanting me to draw closer to Him through this loneliness.

And that's right I have been LONELY! I miss having a gal pal that I can call up and vent to, chat with about whatever or just simply sit and have coffee with and talk about nothing in particular. I had finally learned to love and enjoy having female friends and now it's different. I have friends who invite us over for playdates or coffee but the relationships arent like the others were, like family. But maybe that will also change in time. I really hope they do.

Im not all sure what God is trying to do with me in all of this or with these other ladies, but I trust Him and I know He works everything together for the good of those who love Him. And I dont doubt that any of these ladies love Him!

I can put myself out there over and over but as I was recently remind by a Tweet Rev. Run from Run DMC said (yep that's right :) ) He said stop holding on to people who dont want to be held. If someone has a reason to not want to be your friend there's not a thing you can do to change it. And it doesnt do any good to be mad or to keep trying. You just have to let go until they decide they want you in their life again or if at all.

That seems so harsh to me, but I know if I dont just let go and fully give it over to God nothing good will happen. I have to trust Him and His plan for me and these relationships. And I cant put walls back up against future female relationships because it will hinder my walk with Him and I could end up missing out on some other amazing ladies to call friend.

So only time and patience will tell and I SINCERELY look forward to the day I can update this subject with many great things and answered prayers! :)

So if youre reading this and you have a best friend give a call, invite them out for coffee and dinner and most of all, thank God for them!

Matthew 19:14

2010-08-19T09:36:00.000-05:00

Each week in Brady's curriculum he has a Scripture to memorize. I was amazed at how fast he learned it :)

"Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to Me & do not forbid them; for such is the Kingdom of Heaven.'" Matthew 19:14

Brady starts Kindergarten!

2010-08-19T09:12:00.000-05:00

Well of course he has a GREAT teacher in his mommy ;) We've only been at it a week but I cant be more thankful that God has called our family to homeschooling! I love our new curriculum! It's completely Christ centered and challenges my lil braniac's mind all the while teaching him not just academics but also the Word of God! Here are some pics from our 1st week.

Confession from a former Twilight fan :)

2010-06-30T17:01:00.000-05:00

"Much of the allure about Twilight is that it appeals to our heart, or rather the unmet needs and issues of our heart. The driving need for escape, for romance, for the supernatural. We are investing enormous amounts of time, money and emotional resources on a fictitious toxic romance about the supernatural. Because we are not grounded in the truth of God's Word, and are not being transformed, we are easily deceived and drawn away from the truth to fill the empty void in our lives." - from Deborah Collins

I'm not gonna lie-I used to be a Twihard & a HUGE Harry Potter fan. Anytime & every time a Christian had something bad to say I got VERY defensive & had a list of reasons/excuses as to why these books/movies weren't affecting my walk with Christ-I know now that was lie straight from Satan I allowed myself to believe :/

Earlier this year at a ladies' retreat God awakened something deep within me-this complete yearning & longing for Him on such a more intimate level that I had never really thought about before. I tried on MY OWN to do away w these books/movies/ other TV shows etc but kept failing. Finally I realized that I couldn't do it-but I prayed that God would open my eyes to the things that had my heart more than He did & of course these particular books & movies were the first thing He showed me.

I knew it would be only by His grace that could just let it go. It was hard throwing these books away because they had cost a good bit of money over time-but I knew what God had for me on the other side would be worth it.

Now this is my personal testimony & God is still working on me. In fact I had come up w a plan to sneak & see the movie not telling anyone, but luckily with prayer, it faded away. And there are still other things of this world I need to draw away from in order to continue to draw closer to God.

I don't want to settle for an on the surface type Christianity where I fool myself into thinking certain things are OK when I know God is asking more from me. And I DEFINITELY desire to have more of Him!

No one other than God could have really opened my eyes to this revelation so I don't expect anyone to change their opinion because of me but it is my hope that we continue to seek God & see what He would have for us to give up & do away with in order to know Him in a more intimate way-after all Christ gave His life for us so what is it to do away with some sci-fi/fantasy in order to be more like Him & less like the world?

One thing He brought before me was this: how often have I had such an eagerness to read the Bible the way I've been so eager to read these books? Would I wait outside church for hours to make sure I had a good seat? If my church were having service from 12 am-2am would I be that excited to go as I was to see these movies?

My answer to Him was NO to all of them which made me realize He wasn't as much of a priority to me as these things were & thus my journey with Him to remove ALL things that come before Him began & it still continues :)

I only posted my lil testimony about because I have defended myself watching/reading the things before & I knew I needed to share my awakening :).

I don't expect anyone to change their mind because of me & I believe VERY strongly that God probably wouldn't have changed my old thoughts if I hadn't started to seek Him on a different level. You know the verse that says draw close to Him & He will draw close to you? Well I know now in order for us to be closer some things have to be put away, albeit earthly things such as books/movies/TV or other things such as anger, unforgiveness, fear, pride etc etc etc :) I'm just grateful He keeps pursuing me & that He covers me in grace!

Sigrest Boy #3!!!

2010-06-24T13:17:00.001-05:00

We are OVERJOYED to announce that Boy#3 is on his way!!! Though we still havent picked a name I am very ready to have one picked so I can call him by name! Brady was disappointed because he wanted a sister SOOOO bad! But he's coming around to it! He loves the name Keller for his new brother but Daddy isnt completely sold just yet ;)

FOR SALE-Homeschool stuff & Workbooks

2010-06-14T14:20:00.000-05:00

PLEASE pass this along to anyone who you think may be interested :) Thanks!!

My Father's World Kindergarten Teacher's Manual & flashcards $50 (saves you $13, you'll just have to go on-line & order the additional worksheets)

MFW Textured letters- $8

Cuisenaire Rods- $18 Cuisenaire Rods Alphabet book-$8

Hooked on Writing- $20 (Retails for $64.99, mine is just missing one wb that really isnt needed & the crayon, marker & pencil, but you can use your own)

A Reason for Writing K- $14

The COMPLETE Book of Math Grades 1 & 2- $14

101 Things Every Kindergarten Should Know About Math- $5

Summer Bridge Activities Preschool-K- $5

PK-1st Letters, #s, Colors, & Shapes WB-$5

Parents Magazine Preschool & Kindergarten WBs- $2 each

Look & Learn Counting (Hardcover Book)- $2

****The Following Workbooks are $1 each :)

Fisher Price Preschool Book 2 w/ stickers
FP Kindergarten Books 1 & 2 each w stickers
FP 1st Grade Books 1 & 2 w/stickers
FP 5-in-1 1st grade Book 2 w/flashcards

1st Grade Phonics w/stickers

1st Grade Addition & Subtraction w/stickers

*******The Following Workbooks are $0.50 Each :)

Precious Moments Learn & Color K-1st

Everyday Math Kindergarten Book 1 (not a workbook)

Winnie the Pooh Shapes & Sizes

Scooby Doo Printing Practice
Scooby Doo Adding & Subtracting

Mickey Mouse Alphabet

Tracing Skills for Pre-writing

Spiderman Printing Practice
Spiderman #s & Counting to 100

2 Sesame Street Math Skills (PK-K)
Sesame Street Counting

Learning Line Counting 1-100 (K-1st)

Number Skills (K-1st)

Disney Add & Subtract

Our New Addition

2010-04-22T13:58:00.000-05:00

Ive havent been on here in a while due to some MAJOR sickness....though it is ABSOLUTELY miserable....I take it with stride cause the sicker I am the healthier this lil baby is! So hopefully in a bout 3 more wks it will have fully passed and I can enjoy the 2nd trimester!

New Again!

2010-04-03T20:26:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite Easter songs! Cannot even begin to imagine what it was like for Mary to see her beloved Lord and darling Son be brutally beaten & crucified on the Cross!

Brady Counting in 2 languages

2010-03-18T19:47:00.000-05:00

Who needs Rosetta Stone when you got Dora & Ni Hao Kai-Lan??? :) hehehe

We had also studied the 5 senses that week too...Brady picks up things so easily...Im so glad he loves learning!

My lil frog Prince :)

2010-03-18T19:41:00.000-05:00

Not sure how he does this but it sure does make me giggle!

Purged!

2010-03-11T08:54:00.000-06:00

That almost doesnt sound like a real word but it happened to me! And hopefully it'll keep on happening! :) For so long I deceived myself thinking that certain books, movies, tv shows, etc werent hurting my relationship with God. I told myself that God hadnt convicted me of them so therefore it was ok. Well I never really felt convicted but as a growing Christian who is seeking God I should have known better anyway.

But the more Christians blasted these things the more I wanted to defend myself...I mean who were they judge me? And it's not like they were coming to me personally in Christ's love to share what they knew, they were posting it all over Facebook as a generalized, vague status which made me angry. So I never even tried to understand where they were coming from because of the way they handled themselves.

Since 2010 began I have had a stirring inside me to know Jesus more personally, as my Bridegroom. To understand what it means to put Him first, to love Him most, to just sit and be with Him. At Bible study a fabulous lady from my church came and talked to us about spirits, good and evil. She talked about how WE control which spirits we operate under and that WE have the authority in Christ to cast down those bad ones and choose to be under the ones Christ has set for us. I had never heard anyone speak on these things before and it made me hungry to know more!

At the Ladies' Retreat I went to, the Holy Spirit tore right through me! I remember standing and praying while singing and then I was just overcome by His presence and began crying and laughing at the same time. I was shocked and happy and so many other emotions because I had never felt the Holy Spirit so much before in such an all consuming way!

From there I knew things, MANY things, were about to change, and I didnt mind at all! I was excited and eager! This past weekend I attended a ministry event that focused on the steps of healing in Christ. We went over so many things that I never really thought about how they affected my and my relationship in Christ. Some were obvious, but God was seriously opening my eyes to others.

I went home that evening threw away many books and things that the Lord had convicted me of and opened my eyes to. It felt so good! But I have to admit, it's not easy because when you are used to something for SO long and you get rid of it there is still a tug to turn back to it. But I am so thankful that God is right beside me walking with me and that He has sent me some AMAZING Christian friends who have prayed for me and will continue to pray for me!

I confessed what I had done to my Sunday school class and a friend came up to me afterward and gave me the BIGGEST hug and told me how happy and proud she was! That she had been praying for me about this issue of what I was reading and watching! She never condemned me personally or vaguely on Facebook. Instead she simply lifted me up in her prayers! How grateful I am to her!

So anyway, I have been purged and it feels FABULOUS! I cant wait to see what's next in the journey I am on with my Bridegroom! He is jealous for me and He loves me so much more than I can truly comprehend! :)

Fall in love w God!

2010-02-25T09:08:00.000-06:00

This weekend I went on the Ladies' Retreat my church hosted it it exceeded my expectations greatly :) The theme was to "Come Away w/the Bridegroom" and I must say it felt like a honeymoon with Jesus! Here are some of the notes I got from this weekend:

The 1st and greatest commandment is to love the Lord with ALL that we are and to love Him first above ALL OTHER THINGS! Matthew 22:37-38

Loving God is want He wants the most and it MUST be our core identity. God owns everything, He needs NOTHING, but He desires for us to give Him our hearts and loyalty. Like Martha in the Bible many of us look and seek for what God wants us to do...to serve in some form. But God longs for us to desire Him and be His lover. Luke 10:41-42 Martha Martha youre worried & troubled abt many things. But one thing is NEEDED & Mary has chosen that good part & it WILL NOT be taken away from her.

After all, a LOVER will ALWAYS outwork a SERVANT!

If you want to have an impact of God's heart you HAVE to LOVE HIM! Be obedient. God doesnt define us by our successes and failures...He defines us through Him and His love.Romans 5:5 Now Hope doesnt disappoint bc the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit.

The 1st commandment of LOVING GOD 1st and most WILL MOST DEFINITELY BE the 1st place in the heart of the Bride when Jesus returns. John 4:19 We love Him bc He 1st loved us!

John 15:9 As the Father loved Me I also have loved you; abide in My love!

God loves us the SAME WAY He loves God (Jesus). It gives EVERY believer the right to view themselves as FAVORITES :) King David knew this.

He saw God as a REAL PERSON!
David knew God liked, valued, forgave, and LONGED for him.
David believed he was DEARLY precious in God's eyes!
He knew God LIT UP when He looked at David.
David knew GOd loved him and knew his love for God was REAL & AUTHENTIC.

Even though David was weak he truly enjoyed being an authentic lover of God. Psalm 18:19 He delivered me bc He delighted in me.

There's nothing more powerful than knowing God LIKES us! We know He loves us...but He actually and truly, REALLY REALLY likes us!Jesus values our love MORE than everything under His authority. His heart is filled w delight over a new decision of obedience.

Jesus doesnt sit and wish we were MORE-He enjoys us where we ARE-cheering us on! Helping us to grow.

Like the 5 wise virgins we MUST be prepared for when the Bridegroom comes so we come run out to meet Him...how do we do this? By simply LOVING HIM! Delight in Him! He will bring you works to do for Him through His love. Dont seek ministry and serving opportunities before you just FULLY allow yourself to fall so intimately in love with God! When you have the oil for your lamp (the love and desire of loving Him 1st) He will give you the lamp(s) to put it in (ministry).

A lamp is worthless if there isnt and oil in it. SO LOVE God 1st and most and your ministry and opportunities to serve will come.

We must also be attentive to the what is happening in the world, not casual, the END TIMES are VERY NEAR which means the BRIDEGROOM is coming SOON! Have your oil!

LOVE HIM LOVE HIM LOVE HIM!!!!!

He loves us SOOOOOO very much! Fall madly in love with God! KNow that you are His favorite, He delights in you, He sings over you....Love Him back!

Desert Song!

2010-02-23T09:22:00.000-06:00

I've been singing this song ALL morning! Thought I'd share! :) I love love love the words! Especially the last line that says "I know I'm filled to be emptied again, the seed I've received I will sow" Isn't that our mission as Christians?!

4th day of Creation

2010-02-17T15:28:00.001-06:00

Brady has been learning about the 4th day of Creation and emphasizing on studying the Sun and Moon.

Rylan wanted to paint too (THANK GOODNESS I bought washable paints!)

He traced a circle & cut it out, then Brady colored it w/blue & brown to make it the Earth

Brady's final masterpiece! He cut a small white circle for the Moon & painted silver & gold glitter glue all around for the stars.

Snow Globe Central

2010-02-13T20:03:00.000-06:00

We had SO much fun playing in all the snow we got! Had a great snow ball fight, built a snow slide and a snow man...a fabulous day all together!

Fred had a blast in the snow too! :)

Merry Christmas!

2010-01-26T08:36:00.001-06:00

So I know I'm late getting these up...but better late than never!

This year I got a Nativity Scene for my yard! Each year I plan on adding to it until I get the WHOLE scene!

Making Christmas cookies!

I was so happy it snowed for the boys! But one day is just enough!

At our homeschool Christmas Party

Christmas Eve Night

My favorite part is watching the boys open their gifts!

Brady got a tent and BEGS to sleep in it almost EVERY night!

Anniversary of Roe vs Wade is 1/22

2010-01-21T17:26:00.001-06:00

Go to virtualmarchforlife.com to sign up if you cant be in Washington DC to march. You can also see all of the leaders who have signed up, such as Sarah Palin, Mike Huckabee, John McCain etc.

Dont forget to be in prayer tomorrow for an end to abortion. Also pray for all the men and women who have already made this choice, pray that they find salvation and healing through Christ and that through their testimony others wouldnt make the same choice of abortion. Pray for the drs, nurses, and the many others who work in these clinics...Jesus died for them too! PRAY PRAY PRAY!!!

Thanksgiving Program Videos

2010-01-21T11:09:00.000-06:00

Brady YAWNS a lot in the videos! Poor thing woke up at 5:30 am so we could catch our flight back to MS in time for his program. He was such a trooper!

Fall 09 Pics

2010-01-21T10:29:00.000-06:00

OOOOHHHH Ive been a BAD blogger! :) Our old computer messed up awhile back and I just havent got back in the groove of bloggin! So the next few post I'll try and catch up!

The following pics are from October and November...enjoy the sweet faces of my boys!

Brady went through a HUGE dinosaur phase and just HAD to be a terranadon!

We flew to TX to visit my mom for her 60th bday

Rylan's 1st pumpkin

The truth ain't easy!

2009-11-11T08:24:00.000-06:00

Last night I had to be brutally honest about something God laid on my heart. I to call out certain actions of another person, but not in a gossipy way, but in truth because God asked me to. I ignored His request for about two months, but realized last week He would hold me accountable if I didnt do what He ask me to do.

Well telling the truth AIN'T easy!!! I felt attacked for my honesty, even though I offered mercy and gave example how I had been on the other side before. I know first hand how important it is to be held accountable by other Christians, to repent and turn away in order to fully turn to Jesus. Their grace and forgiveness meant a lot to me! SO eventhough we sometimes have to speak up and speak truth, it doesnt have to be a "mean" thing...we should do so in love for the person or group and first for the Lord.

I knew I was going to feel attacked because the others have turned a blind eye for so long and dont feel comfortable speaking up especially in situations like this. I guess this is why God asked me to do it. He knows good and well I dont have problem speaking up LOL...I guess I should accept this as a gift from Him!

So though I did do what God asked me, it still hurt to feel condemned by the others for being honest even if what I said was Biblical. Then my dear sweet friend who didnt even know how I was feeling sent me a verse that stated EXACTLY how I felt!

Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth? – Galatians 4:16

So all in all, I know I did what was right by God and Im ok with that. His Word clearly states we will be persecuted for doing right because He was persecuted as well. Just please pray for this situation! I know Im very vague on it, but I just have to be :)

How the lost get found!

2009-11-02T08:40:00.000-06:00

LOVE the words to this song!! Everytime I hear it it reminds to do whatever I have to do to share God's love with others...and even if Im not perfect HE IS! I just have to stay faithful and love love LOVE!

The Lord is goooooooood!!!!!!!!

2009-10-06T10:28:00.001-05:00

It has been awhile! Our computer has broken so I have been a bad blog reader and writer the last month :)

Last year my mom lost her home in Hurricane Ike and has been living in a FEMA trailer since last November 11. She recently found out that if she didnt buy her trailer for $2400 she would lose it :( This would leave her homeless or having to moving a couple hours away from her hometown. I asked everyone I knew to please pray for her...well God heard those prayers and came through! My mom's pastor told her yesterday that a man came to him and said God woke him up and told him to pay for my mom's trailer and to have it put on stilts!!! How marvelous is that!?!?!!

She still needs prayer because she doesnt want to be stuck in a FEMA trailer forever! The government is still going through money from various sources to see who qualifies to have a home built... my mom meets all the requirements but that doesnt guaranty her anything...so please keep her in your prayers!

My life has been chaotic for awhile but I feel like I'm moving out of this valley, I pray that I am! It's hard being the youngest in my large dysfunctional family and having to be the one to help everyone else and not feel like I have anyone to turn to for comfort. I had called out to God about this one day, upset, and He asked me a very straightforward question:

AM I NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU??

This broke my heart because He is more than enough! We dont always get what we want and things my not be easy at times, but God is ALWAYS there! He loves us more than we know! So whether Im on the way out of my valley or not, God is with me and my hands shall stay lifted praising His name!

Summer 09 is over

2009-08-31T19:00:00.001-05:00

This summer has gone by FAST! Ive posted some of our favorite times from this summer. Below is a picture of me & my boys August 2008 & then August 2009. ALL of us have gotten bigger...unfortunately for me! BUT that is a changing! :)

They LOVED playing in their sprinkler!

Many a morning the boys & I cuddled on the couch to watch Sid the Science Kid or Super Why

Swimming @ my sister's in TX

Rylan playing outside while I rock in my chair & drink coffee.

The boys got their first dog...DAISY!

Brady in VBS @ CBC & Chauffeuring Rylan in his jeep.

My best friend Ashley welcomed 2 more sons into her family this summer. They adopted Grisha from Ukraine & just last week she gave birth to Jacob!

Working

2009-08-26T10:39:00.000-05:00

Things are still busy around here but in a MIGHTY way! :) God has been working on me in certain areas where he'd like to use me and I am waiting and listening to do His work!

Brady started K4 & Rylan began MMO yesterday at our church. It'll be nice to have 2 days to really get some stuff done! Hopefully in September I'll be able to start some ministry work God has called me to, but first I have to get some things around my house done!

We've got to get our foundation FIXED, rooms painted, floor finished etc etc! I have done REALLY well at getting SOME things organized and keeping them that way! :) Now Brad just needs to hop on board! LoL!

I've been working out 3-4x a week and my eating habits have gotten better! Working on my goal to be in a single digit clothing size by my 30th bday in April! Wish me luck...forget luck...just pray! :)

I am also doing publicity for our church's MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group & I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! I have a degree in PR but never used it because God called me to teach and then by His grace called me home to my boys! It's been so fun and a lot of HARD work putting together fliers, brochures, & newsletters. I feel the Holy Spirit is going to do some mighty things this year through this group! Please join me in praying for the women who will come. Also if you are a MOP :) try and come!

Much love!

Losing it!

2009-08-14T16:12:00.000-05:00

HALLELUJAH!!!!!!! PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!! To HIM be ALL the glory the honor & the praise!!!

Can ya tell Im happy??????

The last year has been a trying one for me...to say the least! I have been working on two major issues in my life...my weight (struggles with food) & my past. Well God in the last 24 hrs has spoken to me, giving me revelations & peace in some MAJOR areas!

Ive been doing a Bible Study the last month dealing with some of my issues from my past. This has been incredibly hard and I have hated going and doing the work...its hard to face and relive it and admit all the faults I have in it! So on my way last night I was talking to my dear friend and I told her that I know there is a pot of gold at the end of this rainbow...its just that this rainbow seems all black & white & gray & Im ready to see some colors!

Well God showed me many wonderful colors last night!

If youve read my blog or my facebook you know this summer has been one thing after another! From sick babies, to a sick momma who always seems to stress me out :), to my brother trying to get help for his addictions, my weight, my skintag procedure, Brady's tonsillectomy, ....on and on and on...when it rains it POURS!!!

I told my husband earlier this week that I have felt SOOOO overwhelmed & that I was barely keeping my head above water & I was so scared that any moment I might give up & drown. THEN God gave me this verse:

Do not be afraid for I've ransomed you I have called you by name;you are Mine! When you go through deep waters I'll be w/you. When you go through rivers of difficulty you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression you will... not be burned up the flames will not consume you! For I am the Lord your God the Holy One of Israel your Savior! Isaiah 43:1b-3a

Arent those just AMAZING words!??! God told me He wasnt going to let me drown! Immediately I began to cry & thank Him for being my LIFE SUPPORT! Then I could feel me losing some tension & grief & shame & other things I felt from my past be released! Oh wow isnt God so FAITHFUL!?!!!

THen today I weighed in at my First Place Bible study to find out that I have lost 8lbs!!! This month has been hectic and I was so scared to get on that scale because I just knew I had gained 5 more lbs in the last month but no I had lost 8!!! I feel so free & excited for what GOd is doing in me! His love NEVER fails! He is always good & He keeps His promises!

I still have a long journey to take, but man o man I cant wait to see what HE continues to reveal to me!

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you & not harm you. Plans to give you HOPE & a future! Then you will call upon Me & come & pray to Me & I will listen to you. You will seek Me & find Me, when you seek Me w/ALL your heart!" Jeremiah 29:11-13

Uploads

2009-08-06T18:55:00.001-05:00

Rylan before his tubes in May

Brady before his surgery to remove tonsils & adenoids in August

My boys shopping in style @ Kroger in July

Brotherly Love in May

Friends who pray

2009-08-05T10:38:00.001-05:00

This summer has been nuts! Well to be honest since late April my life has been nuts! If it werent for the ever presence of God I would be locked up in Whitfield by now! Thankfully the Holy Spirit has held me up, not mention some awesome friends who check on me often and keep me lifted up in prayer. Which reminds me of one of my favorite Bible stories:

^{Exodus 17:10} So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. ¹¹ As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. ¹² When Moses' hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. ¹³ So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.

I LOVE knowing that no matter how hectic my life may get, I have true CHRISTIAN gal pals that I can call on and they will lift me up to Jesus. They are my Aarons & Hurs for sure! God is always with us, His Spirit is always there no matter what it is we are going through. We need to keep praising him through our storms, keep our hands lifted high to exalt His name & when the going gets tough, call on our friends to help us keep them lifted, when all we want to do is just sit and cry. God is awesome everyday!!!

Much LOVE to all my Aarons & Hurs!!!! And when you need me to lift your arms, you know I'll be there for you!!

revisiting my past

2009-07-21T17:45:00.000-05:00

I am going to be as honest as I can...my life has been hard! I had a stinky childhood & adolescence & the majority of my college/adult years has been trying to overcome it & be healed and strengthen and right now I just feel BLAH!

It isnt easy going back and recounting the hurt and pain I have felt and being honest with myself about it and how it has effected me as an adult. I have downplayed how bad my life has been, because I know unfortunately some have it worse & I also like to pretend that I am strong and will survive...but that's me being prideful. The truth is I am not that strong and I still have a long way to go with my healing.

I really want to be angry & let those involved know just how angry I am and what they did was wrong and the pain and heartache it has caused me over the years. I want to walk away be done...but I cant. God has placed inside me a huge heart and no matter how bad I am treated or how hurt I get I still love those people and I still want them to be better than they are. Yet somehow I continuously get hurt & seem to be the one who lives with it everyday all the while the others never seem to have a second thought as to what they did to me...and it's probably because I keep forgiving them & letting them back in.

I want to see the world through the eyes of Christ and I want to love the world as Christ does and be compassionate...but it is hurting me and because I am not God I dont know how to really deal with it. I feel completely torn by the Christian side of me who wants to continue loving and forgiving & the human side that is mad & hurt & torn & wants to walk away and never look back.

I have realized my issues are far deeper than I ever really admitted or cared to notice. I am scared that if I cant get the proper counseling or advice on how to deal with this I am going to be unhappy & turn in to someone I dont like and become a bad influence on my children. I ask that if you are reading this that you lift me up in prayer daily so that Jesus will be the only voice I hear & the only one I follow.

I have always been a loner because I was taught by my family & friends at an early age that I could never fully depend on them & in the end when I really needed support & love, they wouldnt be there the way I needed them to be. Now as a Christian adult I have some really good friends & family that do support me & love me, and yet I find myself still feeling lonely from time to time. I often wonder if i push people away, if there's something in me that makes people not want to be around me, or if I myself am turning my back on them.??? I honestly dont know the answer. Maybe a little bit of all.

God is really working on me right now & am eagerly seeking Him on the kind of person He wants me to be. This isnt easy...in fact it's downright HARD!!! I feel weak and vulnerable and scared that satan is going to sneak in and pull me away without me noticing.

I am doing an intense Bible Study to help me with some of the issues I have & am seeking full and complete healing so in turn I can help others who have walked a similar path . The worst feeling in the world is to feel alone and believe that I dont really matter in the end. I know Christ is on my side, and if it were me alone that He had to sacrifice Himself for...He still would have done it...He is an AMAZING GOD!

And more than anything else...I dont want to displease Him! I want Him to use me for His glory & when He is done with me, to take me to be with Him! But my path isnt easy and I have to be SURE I stay on it & not try to runaway when things get tough. For I know I am truly blessed & highly favored by God!

Vacation Fun!

2009-06-30T20:47:00.000-05:00

For 10 days we were off traveling & visiting Chattanooga, TN; Massanutten Resort, VA; & Washington DC.

Brady leaving his mark on DC...best vacation memory right here!!

Brady's 1st train ride!

Inside a cavern...it was so cool!

Playing in the hands-on section of the science museum

This is how Brad carried Rylan around DC..for the most part!

Pretending to be eaten by a shark :)

@WW2 Memorial

Playing the water-tag maze

Such BEAUTIFUL views in the mountains!!!

Flying down the mountain was a blast

We had an amazing time!

Brtiany's Baccalaureate & Graduation

2009-06-30T20:32:00.001-05:00

Our computer screen has been acting out A LOT so that is why I have yet to update the blog! SORRY! :)

Here are some pics from Britany's Baccalaureate service & graduation

Sorry it's been awhile!

2009-06-10T17:43:00.000-05:00

I apologize for not updating lately! I have been CRAZY busy since late April...which you may have already read a post about that LOL! We just returned Saturday from a 10 day vacation & now I am teaching VBS...which is WEARING ME OUT!!!!!!! :) Plus I have Rylan's first BDAY party on Saturday! So next week I will be blogging a lot to catch up on all that's been going on!

LOVE YALL!!!!!

PS I need someone to hook my up with a new template that showcases some pics of my family at the top :) not sure where to get the hookup from!

King SIngers Program

2009-05-21T16:32:00.000-05:00

Brady started crying when he noticed ALL the people staring @ him :( Though he didn't cry @ his school program??? I think it had been a long day of swimming and playing and he was tired. Makayla ran over to him held his hand tried to get him to smile while Gabriel kept telling him to be brave :) I am so happy Brady already has good Christian friends watching out for him!!

Gabriel had NO problem singing!!! Which I knew he wouldn't...he sings all the time. If anyone reading this doesn't know Gabriel he is my best friend's lil boy who is staying with us for a lil while his parents are in Ukraine adopting the cute lil fellow you see to the right on my blog :)

Gabriel did ALL the motions and had a good ol' time! The only problem were the girls that were standing in front of Gabriel and Brady...they kept covering them up so it was hard to get pics...I think it should be illegal for a lil girl to wear a bow that big LOL just kidding!

Brady started to warm up after a lil while...but instead of singing...

...he started playing peek a boo with me...yes OUT LOUD! :) He'd look at me in the audience and say, "Peek a boo" over and over LOL I loved it!!!
This is Makayla & Brady...she LOVES him to death!!! She is definitely an Alpha-Female and makes sure NO ONE messes with her Brady LOL

Makayla, gabriel & Brady were known as the "3 Musketeers" by their King Singers teachers :)

After the program we came home and the boys decided to play outside and take turns pushing Rylan

It was an AWESOME and HILARIOUS evening!!!

Slip & Slide Fun!

2009-05-18T17:13:00.001-05:00

I bought a slip & slide from Walmart the other day...only $5!!!!! The kids enjoyed soooo much and cant wait til it warms up again so they can do it some more!

Rylan had a blast!

Here comes Gabriel!

Brady slid right off & into some mud!

Britany is a big kid!!

Gabriel wasn't so sure about it.

Nothing like a nice warm bubble bath to wash away the mud & grass! :)

A Busy May! Pics included :)

2009-05-17T20:17:00.000-05:00

Sorry it has been a while since I have written but it has but one CRAZY, BUSY, HECTIC month!!! I help with a ministry at church that keeps up with all the pregnant ladies in our church and 4 of mine gave birth within 2 weeks! Plus I also teach Sunday School, had all the things for Brady's end of year stuff at preschool, plus his T-ball, my niece is graduating and she made it to State for pole vaulting& we gave her a graduation party, Rylan has had a double ear infection for about 2 months but FINALLY got tubes...and now my friend's boys are staying with us while she is in Ukraine....and this is all on top of my daily duties as wife and mommy!!! Now please dont think I am complaining...I love my life...I just need to take a breath! haha! I havent been this busy in a while but at least all of this busyness is due to happy things and not bad things! :) I choose to see the silver lining! The only dark cloud is my eating :( I had been doing awesome but with all this going on I dropped the ball and gained 4 lbs back :( I was VERY self-loathing and beating myself up, but decided to start being more self-loveing and give myself a break. Below are some pictures from most of the events of May...and to think the month is only half begun LOL :)

These are from Britany's Baccalaurette Service @ Church. Look how pretty she is!

These are of Brady's End of Year Party & School Program...yes I know...he is a doll! :)

The 1st pic is w/Mrs. Donna, Brady's teacher, the 2nd is w/Mrs. Jayna, the director, who Brady greated every morning pretending to be asleep in the car as she tried to get him out & then "scared" her :)

Brad & Brady on the T-ball field

More pics to come tomorrow!

Spring has Sprung!

2009-04-28T13:04:00.001-05:00

My cool lil dudes!

Super Slugger!!!!

Rylan doesn't like crawling on the grass, so he crawls on all fours!!

Having a blast on the swing set!

We planted a few things to see how things grow. Brady does a great job at watering them too. I bought Brady a lil magnify glass to go outside & hunt for bugs! He loves it LOL

Preschool Activities | Education.com

2009-04-21T11:49:00.001-05:00

Preschool Activities | Education.com

Posted using ShareThis

As may have noticed or read...I will be home schooling my kiddos :) This was something I had NEVER planned to do, but around August/September I really felt the Lord leading me in this direction. I have always taught Brady :) reading, coloring, shapes, colors etc...like any parent who wants to teach their young child, but probably a bit more :) Brady is like a sponge and LOVES to learn and have anyone's attention and to show what he can do!

I really don't see it as this burden or hard thing to do...we have so much fun! Yesterday we practiced writing & tracing, identifying things as big, bigger, biggest, small smaller, smallest, long & short (you get the picture:) ) We also practiced a few sight words. Brady has been able to spell about 15 or so words for quite so time now...sometimes he forgets but quickly remembers with a lil help. HE taught himself the letter sounds from our LeapFrog magnet thing!

I just try new things and see where he takes it and what likes or doesnt...but we ALWAYS have fun! I love that he's a lil nerd like me! HAHAHA!!!! It certainly doesn't feel like work, it's more like play!

Today I bought these lil $1 plants from Target to plant with Brady. We have strawberries, tomatoes, a tree, & sunflowers. After we plant them in the lil container they came in, we will eventually have to put them int he ground...which SCARES me cause I have NEVER planted anything! So this will be a learning experience for us both! I'll post pics as soon as this project is finished or midway :)

Have a blessd day! OH......if you homeschool or teach...please feel free to point me to web sites you love and activites you think Brady and I will like! Thanks!

EASTER Pics!!!

2009-04-16T21:37:00.001-05:00

Keep on scrollin...got lots of GREAT & SUPER cute pics! :)

Hunting eggs @ Brandon Park

"Oh wow!!! An egg Mama!!!" Look how happy he was!!!

Rylan wasn't too sure about going down the slide.

But boy did he LOVE trying to go up it!!!!!

Brady with his best bud Caleb!

Who needs to hunt eggs??? Rylan had fun just watching all the kids running around!

Cheesin w/all his eggs he found!

C-dawg & Brady hacking into their candy!

Rylan had a blast playing w/the plastic eggs!

Brady w/some of his classmates @ their "Jesus is Alive!" Party

Rylan cracked me up in this swing!!!

beep beep!

Brady w/ some boys from his class waiting on the pizza!

Munchin on a Cheeto!

Easter Day! Aren't ya glad we serve a RISEN SAVIOR!!! Hallelujah Jesus is ALIVE!

I made baskets for the family. I try to use practical things I know they'll like and enjoy :)

Yes I know...my boys are SOOOOOO cute!

This is one handsome kiddo!

Rylan wanted to eat Gran's Easter basket pinata

Tball Brady & Messy Rylan!

2009-04-16T20:55:00.000-05:00

Brady's 1st T-ball practice. Will get pics from games soon! :) They are SOOOOO funny to watch! I laugh so hard I cry!

Yep I'm a MEEESSSSSSSSYYYYYY eater! But I am so daggone cute!

Smilin so big as always!!! :)

Rylan LOVES to look out the window on the door even if you can't see clearly out of it.

Look closely at his diaper cocked to one side LOL not sure how he did that :)

Back view!!! One lil butt-cheek hangin out

He LOVES him some mashed potatoes!

Brad put his plastic file box on the floor & Rylan found it and DESTROYED it!!! He looks like he knows he did something wrong!

Peek -a - boo I see you!

Brady's 4th BDAY

2009-04-16T20:02:00.000-05:00

Brady didn't get to have a train at his party because of bad weather. Luckily we were able to have his party @ Deep South Cheer in Pearl. Gotta love last minute changes LOL

He was SO excited to bring "puc-cakes" to his class!

Brady w/ his birthday crown he got at school!

We are still waiting for the pics some friends took for us @ the party. Brady had a blast! He got a lot of Thomas stuff...like he needed anymore LOL!!! I cannot believe my baby is already4!!!! Where in the world did my time go?!?!?

On Brady's actual birthday he wanted to go eat at AppleBee's w/our friends Jeff & Jamie. The 1st pic is Brady being shy when they sang happy birthday to him. Whenever they left though he laughed so hard and smiled from ear to ear!! :) He definitely enjoyed the ice cream they brought him!

Sick of Sickness!

2009-04-15T19:01:00.001-05:00

So for the last month, my precious lil Rylan has had a double ear infection and a bad cough...he started running fever Friday and throughout the weekend so Monday I took him back to the dr and they did 3 days of Rocephin shots:( My lil man took it like a champ as always :) HE cried then I gave him his paci and held him and he stopped! He's one tough cookie!

Well Monday night Rylan slept well, but Brady came and got in bed with us and coughed ALL night long! So no sleep for me on Monday. He woke up and felt fine so I shipped him off to preschool and when I picked him up from his play day he was whining about his mouth hurting. I told him to point to where it hurt and he opened his mouth and pointed to his throat. It looked horrible. On the way home he cried everytime he coughed and by the time we got home he had a fever of 101.7 :(

So today I took Rylan to the dr for his last shot and BRady had to get a penicillin shot because he has STREP!!! :( I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO exhausted! Two sick kiddos and no sleep is catching up with me BIG time! So please say a prayer for my boys to get well soon. I hate seeing them hurt so bad!

Part of my wants to mope and complain but everytime I whine I think of Tisha Nickens who just lost her 4 yr old son...I would much rather be exhausted from taking care of sick kids than to have gone through what she and her family has endured. Please continue to pray for their family! Can't even imagine the pain and suffering they have and are feeling.

Hopefully when I get some more time I will get some more pics of the kiddos on here. :) Until then take care and remember that I love ya!

God's grace is sufficient !!!

2009-04-07T10:41:00.001-05:00

I just have to share that yesterday was AWESOME! I ate well, worked out, spent time with my Lord...every time I turn around He is speaking more of His Truth to me!

I went to MOPS yesterday and had a great time painting onesies for the Center for Pregnancy Choices. Mrs. Beth Bryant spoke to us about discipline and how the Lord works through us to grow our children in all ways. I love hearing that woman speak!!!

My heart breaks for those who dont know Christ..and for those people who think they are Christians, but are lacking the "fruit" of one! :( I have spent WAY too much time thinking I could never be good enough for the Lord to use me or really show me favor...but I know now that I am not and will not be good enough, but through Christ God sees me as perfect because HIS SON paid the price for me! For me! Really? YES and for YOU TOO!!!

I'm crying now just thinking about it! :) After all I have done, thought, said..etc...God sees me as perfect because HIS SON took my place on that cross and bore my sins so I could spend eternity with Him! Talk about love!!! The only thing I can do to ever try and pay Him back is to offer my heart, everything I am to Him so others may see His glory.

"Shine your light so brightly before men so they may see your good works & glorify your Father which is in Heaven" Matthew 5:16

I love listening/singing the song "The Stand" by Hillsong United. Oh how it just speaks to me! Here are the lyrics:

You stood before creation, eternity within You hand
You spoke the earth into motion, my soul now to stand.
You stood before my failure carried the Cross for my shame
My sin weighed upon Your shoulders, my soul now to stand!

So what can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart O God completely to YOU!!!

So I'll walk upon salvation Your Spirit alive in me! This life to declare Your promise, my soul now to stand.

So what can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart O God COMPLETELY to YOU!!! So I'll stand with arms high & heart abandoned in awe of the One who gave it ALL! So I'll stand my soul Lord to You surrendered!!!

All I am is YOURS!

(Also check out Jeremy Camp's "My Desire"...don't you love God's gift of music!)

Every time I think about it I get chills...He took our place! So what can we do? Certainly not sit around just claiming to be Christian...but going and doing His will...showing His glory to others, be the body of Christ, love others, sacrificing whatever we have to in order for His grace, mercy, love & power to be seen by others...to be FELT by others.

"Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, 'Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?' Then I said, 'Here am I! Send me.'" Isaiah 6:8

Father, please help me to NEVER forget what you have done for me! Help me Lord to show the world how amazing You are! Allow me to be Your vessel so that You may be glorified through the work You have asked me to do! Help me to hold tight to what You have spoken in Your Living Word! Thank You Father for being my Lord, my Daddy, my BEST FRIEND, my Savior, my EVERYTHING!

Now go read Hebrews 9:11-the end of the book!! GOOOOOOOOOD stuff!!!!!

LOVE YOU ALL VERY MUCH!

Diary of a mad FAT woman! Part 2

2009-04-06T14:32:00.000-05:00

This is me with my sisters Mignon and Beverly. I mainly posted this pic to show myself just how big I am even though Beverly is half covering me! Now dont go saying that I'm not big....cause we both know the truth.

This is the biggest I have ever been and it's not right to allow myself to be lazy and indulgent.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."
I Corinthians 6:19

This verse is EXACTLY why I should not allow myself to continue the bad habits that I have acquired....gluttony and laziness!!!! Such major sins that don't get admitted very often. Some people are addicted to drugs or alcohol, but I tell you being addicted to food is just as bad! By turning to food instead of God is just as harmful to our bodies as sinful as turning to substance abuse!

So patterns are being broken! I've complained and whined and moaned..yadda yadda...for TOO long about this. I've laid at the feet of Jesus and am ready to win this battle in His name. Luckily God has blessed me with incredible support through friends who struggle with the same issue and a friend like Danielle whom I can count on for ANYTHING!

I have said before that Jesus had called me to a certain ministry..which I still cant specifically mention just yet :)...and since I have surrendered to it, Satan has been attacking me hard in other areas. Food being one. But I told the lil hell-monger to leave me alone! I claim it in JESUS and the POWER of HIS BLOOD!

So here's my truth by the numbers...I am almost 29, 5'6, about 200 lbs and a BMI of about 32. HORRIBLE...SHAMEFUL...NO EXCUSES!!! How on earth can my body be a FUNCTIONAL temple of God if I am not taking care of it? It can't..but I can't do this without Jesus! My battle with food is much too strong to fight alone or with some diet-fad!

Each week I will post an update of how I'm doing and I ask that you pray for me. God has healed me and helped me overcome SO many things before this and I refuse to be my own stumbling block! The fact that Jesus bought me with His Blood is reason enough to keep my temple pure because it's His first.

Learning Fun & Organization Help!!

2009-03-25T14:53:00.000-05:00

Ok...first off....LEARNING FUN!

Today I let Brady skip preschool because the weather was so yucky and I didnt want to get Rylan out in it. I bought this preschool book from Walmart yesterday and wanted to do it with Brady. He did so good! We worked on tracing, shapes, patterns, and classifying things as big or small. So throughout the day I have heard him point out things that were like circles, squares...etc. He's known his shapes for ever, but today I explained that a tire, a ball, and other round things are like circles and how other "real" things are like the other shapes too. It was COOL to hear him pointing out things and what shapes they look like! I also heard him making comparisons to what things were big and which were small! I absolutely LOVE this! It just clarifies in an even bigger way that I am going to home school! :)

Ok now to the ORGANIZATION HELP!!!!! :(

I have a hard time keeping paper organized....example...mail that cant be thrown away, instruction books to electric things, the list goes on and on and on and on.....you get the point!

So I was wondering what advice yall may have to keep my paper organized what items yall may have purchased to keep it all together and basically ANY organization tips yall can offer me!

Thanks and MUCH LOVE!

Slow & Steady Wins the Race

2009-03-23T10:40:00.000-05:00

It's been a little while since I've posted...I've had A LOT on my plate! Mostly due letting the enemy win in small battles which accumulated to bigger things than I thought! It's all good now....I've taken my stance against the king of lies and am marching full steam ahead....well kinda....

...You know the old childrens' story "the Tortoise and the Hare?" Well I am taking lessons from the tortoise...slow and steady wins the race! Which is funny because I could have learned from the Word of God too! :) So many verses that pertain to this...even my own blog...Finishing is better that starting, Patience is better than pride. Ecclesiastes 7:8.

I am very impatient and want things now and dont want to wait and think I should see results faster....well unfortunately for me it doesnt work that way. Instead of wanting to see immediate results in my life...fitness/health, ministry, home, etc...I'm holding on to the idea that slow and steady will win it and trying to get done quickly will inevetably make me lose.

Two Sundays ago I was able to attend my old Sunday School class and the message was AWESOME! Of I cant remember word for word but something said has been in my mind ever since. The teacher, John Wilson, made the comment about how Jesus didnt even start his ministry until He was 30...and how as Christians we shouldnt base our efforts on short amounts of time...the we were faithful for a month or things were good this year...that instead we should look at the decades...how faithful have we been in the last decade? How have we grown in the last decade? This really puts it into a huger perspective for me. I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY suggest you listen to this message! You can hear it at www.n1accord.org.

Well I am signing off for now..gotta go get some work done in my house :) Have a blessed day and I will try and get pics of Brady's party on here soon!

much love!

2009-03-09T18:26:00.001-05:00

Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys
or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not
my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on..
I had complete control of my mind
and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child
so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night
watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because
I didn't want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of
having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel
to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond
between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom..
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom.

SIGH

2009-03-09T18:02:00.001-05:00

So much is going on with me I dont even know where to start and the crazy thing I cant really tell everything that's going on! Just PRAY for me Tuesday, March 10!!! I hope there comes a time when I can fully open up on this blog about what God is doing with me and for me, but I cant at the moment.

I will however say that I have been facing some demons from my past and I havent had a lot of sleep because of it. The last few nights have been better, for God keeps placing some wonderful women in my path to encourage me and comfort me.

Please pray for me tomorrow as it is a HUGE step of faith I am taking in Christ!!!! Also...on a smaller note...please pray that it WONT rain Saturday for Brady's Bday party!

Thanks and MUCH LOVE,

Ash

Confession is good for the soul!

2009-02-27T13:30:00.001-06:00

I have been opening myself up the last month sharing my testimony/past with some close friends and folks at my church and I cannot even begin to tell you all how freeing it is! I know that God is about to do an amazing work through me soon and it is my UTMOST prayer that I will remain faithful and obedient and not surrender to fear, but only to God!

I met with a friend yesterday who felt led to tell me something that she experienced in her past and how she still struggles with it today. Not always...God has forgiven her and she has worked through it, but sometimes the enemy still brings it back up and because many people don't know she keeps it inside. After our talk I assured her that she could call on me anytime and I would be there.

I also shared with her my own struggles, my past and how God has worked in me and how He continues to work in me...and we had a REALLY good talk. I think it is vital that Christians feel free enough to open up to fellow believers about their struggles/issues they have.

Proverbs 27:17 says " Iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend."

We Christians have to get passed judging others...even if we say we don't we know we sometimes do...and we have to get passed our own fears and be open about what God is helping us deal with. Being able to confess or talk about our struggles, issues, pasts, etc will help others who are going through the same thing or at least something similar feel better about opening up and get the healing they need from Jesus, the same healing He has given others in the same situations.

Most of my life I have used the excuse that other Christians would not understand where I was coming from and I let that keep my from growing in Christ and finding healing and close Christian relationships. That is a LIE from the pits of hell! Satan uses that to keep us from healing and growing in the Lord and it prevents God from getting HIS glory for saving us and forgiving us and healing us!!!!

It is my hope that I will learn to be more bold about what God has done for me, what He's doing for me, and what He will do with me. :) I hope that I will see the day when ALL Christians will rise and confess their struggles and God is helping them through so that all the world may see how faithful and merciful our God is!

This is me at the beginning of my senior year in high school. At this point in my life I was VERY unhappy, sad, and felt worthless...but I hid it all from everyone I knew. My life stunk and I chose to cope with it using alcohol. Little did I know that my senior year would be the most HORRIBLE year of my life and that my life would go from bad to MUCH worse!!!!!

The pain and hurt I would endure would leave me so lost, so devastated that a week before my graduation I would find myself standing in my kitchen ready to kill myself and end it all. I was so broken and felt I had nothing to live for and continued to make bad decisions and pretend that everything was fine. Luckily for me all this bad is what made me SO incredibly DESPERATE for Jesus! I tried so hard for so many years to run from the pain and keep it a secret...but God is now using it for HIS glory and to help others heal from their own pasts.

In closing let me say there is NOTHING in this world that you could have done that the Holy Blood of Jesus Christ can't heal! And He LOVES you just as you are! Isn't that amazing!?!!!! Don't let Satan keep you trapped like I was for so long! Jesus died for ALL sin! NO ONE is perfect, we ALL need HIM!

"Jesus paid it all! All to Him I owe! Sin had left a crimson stain; HE washed it white as snow!"

I LOVE YALL!!!!

Our 1st sleep over!

2009-02-20T11:19:00.002-06:00

So Brady has a BEST friend named Gabriel whom he loves very much! Gabriel was able to come and play yesterday and was refusing to go home...so I told his mommy, Ashley, that he could stay the night with us and of course big brother Samuel wanted to stay too. :) They had a lot of fun! This was the 1st time Brady had a sleepover and he thought it was so cool to sleep on the air mattress with his friend :)

They played forever in the playroom and Brady could not understand why Gabriel didnt want to play with his trains anymore :) For those you who dont know...Brady is OBSESSED with trains...not exaggerating!! So when Gabriel decided he wanted to play with something else, Brady was very upset, but quickly got over it when they decided to take a bubble bath. After their bath they sang a lot of songs...mostly Happy Birthday to each other and to Rylan. I'm not sure if Rylan liked it a lot or not, because he kept screaming (in a funny way) when Gabriel sang to him. I think he might have been trying to sing too. HA HA! Brady and Gabriel also like to pretend that Rylan is a monster or a dinosaur that is trying to get them when he crawls around...it's pretty funny :)

Then we made some yummy chocolate chip cookies and Britany and I played Yahtzee with Samuel...dude totally had beginner's luck!!Rylan also enjoyed playing with Samuel and his hat :) Then we all settled down and watched Blues Clues til bedtime. Of course right before bed Gabriel wanted his mommy, but luckily his big brother was there to help him through it. Then this morning Rylan woke up about 3 am so I got up to attend to him, laid him back down about 330 and went off to sleep again. Then about 4 I heard Gabriel whining that he wanted his mommy :( It was so sad. So I got up and went to comfort him and let him sleep with me and Brad. Then about 430 Rylan was crying again (gas) so I got back up and since I was SO tired I thought, "well let's just put him in bed with us too so I can sleep." Yeah, that didnt happen.

So I get to my room and Gabriel had moved over and was so sprawled out I couldnt get into bed and I was too afraid to move him in case he woke up crying. So Rylan and I slept on the air mattress with Brady...needless to say I didnt sleep very well. But I must say we had a lot of fun! I absolutely adore Samuel and Gabriel and we all enjoy when they get a chance to come visit us!

We all got up this morning happy as could be, ate some pancakes and now the kiddos are playing again! I love that Brady has a best bud who I know will grow up to be a good Christian friend to have around! After all...his mom and dad are mine and Brad's best friends too :)

Diary of a mad FAT woman!

2009-02-17T10:14:00.000-06:00

Ok now really...is it THAT hard to eat good? Should it REALLY be this HARD????

ALL my adult life I have struggled with my weight...I have tried every "diet", taken laxatives, starved myself, tried throwing up....you name it I have tried it. LUCKILY God got a hold of me on my VERY unhealthy habits...but I cant seem to stick to just simply eating well to save my life!

I weighed this morning to find I havent lost any weight...no surprise my eating habits STINK! I've been doing good exercise wise, but the whole eating thing is just beyond me! Last fall I did First Place at church, but I couldnt justify sitting for 2 hours talking about why I was overweight instead of going to an aerobics class that I love and challenges me...so I didnt do it this semester. Maybe those 2 hours would have done me good...who knows!?!

I am about 30 lbs heavier than I was when I got pregnant with Rylan and he is now 8 1/2 months! I had a good plan in place...eat healthy, exercise and train for a 5k walk/run...needless to say it didnt fully happen. Then in December my goal was to lose 29 lbs by my 29th birthday in April...VERY doable....not doing so well :( I have been working out more, but then I allow myself to eat whatever I want and the scale isnt budging...to no surprise...

I just feel exhausted with this whole thing. I had an accountability partner, but she bailed out on me for some lame reasons, and I live with 2 people who can eat whatever they like and still look athletic, fit and healthy....and I gain at least a pound from looking at what they eat! Will this cycle ever end???? Will I ever accomplish my goal?? When I did a calculation of my weight/age/BMI etc..I expected to be overweight, because I know I am...but I am technically classified as OBESE!!!! YES.....ME....OBESE!!!!!!

When I got my Wii Fit and did the little test in the beginnig I didnt know whether to laugh or cry when my Mii character got fat because I am infact FAT! Dont you DARE comment and say a bunch of fake nice stuff...I know as Christians you will want to make me feel all better and tell me happy little things..like I look good or I am not fat...but the scale doesnt lie and the Wii Fit tells you...or shows you just how it REALLY is! I am FAT and I am OBESE :(

SO the verse for my blog, Finishing is better than starting, patience is better than pride...Ecc 7:8 is my mantra for ALL things now. I have started SOOOO many times to get healthy, fit, etc but to no avail to quit/stop because I wasnt being patient with the results or I gave in...so I know with out a doubt this is something I cannot quit! I have to finish and reach my goal of losing about 50 lbs or dropping at least 3-4 dress sizes. Now dont say I dont need to lose 50 lbs...if you knew my weight you wouldnt say anything! According to my nurse and BRad I dont look like I weigh what I weigh...but I do and I cant change it by what I am currently doing.

I will now be adding my journey on the road to a healthier me on my blog...with the intent of being as honest as possible. I do ask for prayer on this because my will-power with food is non-existent. I have battled Satan on so many things, God has seen me through so many battles and wars in my life and this whole food thing has got to be won SOON! I dont want to have to apply for the Biggest Loser one day because I never got conquered it....though a month with Bob and Jillian would do me good :)

I did meet an aerobics instructor last week who was about 250 lbs a lil over a year ago and she looks FABULOUS now....she is my inspiration..we are very much alike when it comes to body image, food control...or lack of...and hopefully next week when I post I will have at least lost 2 lbs. That is my goal for this week....wish me luck...better yet...just pray for me on this!